Inspiration and Hope for Emotional Healing

Taking your life back
It is never too late to heal

I received a comment from a reader this week that just blew my socks off. I was inspired, flattered and thrilled by her words. I was reminded of why I do this work and why I chose to create this website (emerging from broken) in the first place. This is what it is all about! These comments are so filled with life and hope that I asked for permission to share them with my readers because hope for emotional healing was the first key for me. Please welcome Diane and her lovely comments by sharing your thoughts with her and I.

Diane’s comments came in on the blog post “Security Blanket of Coping Methods ~ My Survival Mode” which was written over two years ago in February 2010!    

Here is what Diane said:

I found the archives! I didn’t know there were archives, so now I have so much more to read and learn and grow from! Yay! I went through something so life changing last week and weekend and I have spent this week simply allowing the reality of it and the joy of it soak in. I became healed and free at the core of my being from the abuse of my parents..from caring about them and what they used to think of me…from wondering WHY did they abuse me…from excusing them from abusing me…from hating myself to loving and liking myself…and the list goes on! This is what I have been hoping, praying, searching, crying and desperate for!

Last week the puzzle pieces to my childhood all fell into place for the very first time in my life and I was able to let all of the blame and shame and hatred and dislike and rejection of ME GO forever. I now feel WHOLE as a person for the very first time…I don’t even feel damaged! I was crushed like a bug and now I am not. Now I feel compassion for myself…which I have never felt before. I want to heal more and more the bad habits I developed in trying to cope with abuse and neglect and move forward away from everything unhealthy. It is like a miracle has happened to me and I am so grateful and happy and the most important thing to me is that I can just BE MYSELF. I am able to just BE. No sense that something or someone is looming over me in disgust at how I act or what I say or how I do or don’t do things….no guilt and shame that I am less than ANYONE else. All of those feelings have disappeared. I don’t have to pretend or wear a mask in order to please someone. I really don’t have words to describe this new freedom, but I can say this: I WANT to learn now how to care for ME in new ways…I want to get rid of anything and everything that has held ME back.

I am now able to see when I need to question why I respond in different situations like I do. My next biggest “level” of healing is going to be with my husband. We definitely love each other in a healthy way, but there are also old patterns that just won’t work anymore. His silences…and me trying to fill them. It is amazing how silence can be controlling of someone else…deliberately. So I want to tackle this in our marriage..and I know he is trying to heal and change too, so I am looking forward to this process over time. I am really enjoying that now there is going to be a new process to change and living. I look forward to not trying to escape my life…but to BE IN IT and living it in the present.

I always felt like I was waiting for my life or something big to happen in the future, but really I was running away from myself and my life to a huge degree because I didn’t feel worthy of anything good for myself. I was the biggest cheerleader for everyone else, but I always only pretended that I was secure and motivated and full of self esteem…I wanted my daughter to have that as a mother and not how I really and truly felt on the inside. Now I don’t have to pretend and it isn’t because of anything other than I now believe it. My parents were so wrong in what they did and what they said and how they treated me…..and it was not love. I can now accept all that and I am not sad to let them go…I am more than happy not to have that in my life anymore! Yay!

So…I just wanted to say that my summer is going to be spent in loving myself and learning to self care and self soothe and find out what I want to DO now. Anytime I might feel the old emptiness or loneliness or voids, I am going to begin to ask myself WHAT DO I NEED right now!

Thank you Darlene….many many hugs and thanks to YOU!  ~ Diane

Please share your thoughts with Diane and I.

Inspiring hope on the road to healing;

Darlene Ouimet

Did you know that the Emerging from Broken book “The Beginning of Hope for Emotional Healing” is ready for download! If you find that the subject matter I am writing about resonates with you, get this book today! This 197 page, downloadable, printable, live linked e-book will put you on the fast track to healing.  Get yours here through the upper right side bar or click this link~ Emerging from Broken The Beginning of Hope for Emotional Healing

Check out Emerging from Broken on Facebook ~ your comments here are NOT posted on Facebook. This site is private and only the name YOU use in the comment form will be public. You are welcome to use any name you wish.  

See the original post and comments here:    Security Blanket of Coping Methods by Darlene Ouimet                                                



69 response to "Inspiration and Hope for Emotional Healing"

  1. By: kelly Posted: 24th June

    Am I ever glad I stumbled onto this site, it is a wonderful feeling knowing I am not alone. I have done a ton of reading here and I am starting not to beat myself up so much, and seeing things as they really are.
    I have a blood disease and fibromyalgia, both together when I have a flare is a painful living hell. The trouble with me is my family thinks I have made all of this up because I am lazy and don’t want to work. I have raised three wonderful kids on my own, put myself through 4 years of school to become a nurse without any help what so ever from my family who have always said I was nothing but a useless, stupid fing bitch. I really thought I was stupid so when O applied to collage I was scared to death thinking I might not be able to do this. Funny after the four years I ended up graduating with honours, was on the dean’s list with a scholarship award for clinical and academic excellence. Imagine that! Not one of my family would go to my graduation, I was so hurt I ended up not going either.
    Now because of my health issues I cannot do what I loved with a passion, I am not dependable to work, I don’t know what my body will do 5 minutes from now. I have been in hospital many times and not once did any of my FOO come to visit me. My Foo has not ever seen me when I have had an attack until last summer. That time my monster attacked my lungs and I was having trouble breathing and was in horrid pain. My father was there when the ambulance got there, I could see in his face he was shocked. Did he go to the hospital, NO.
    I have a brother whom I have always adored. Over the years he has worked very hard and is worth mega bucks today. Also over the years he has become very arrogant and a know it all. A few years back at Christmas time he had a few to drink and got on the subject of how useless and lazy I am because I just don’t want to work. I sat there and took an entire evening of nothing but abuse. Last weekend I went to his house for an over night visit. The same thing started to happen and I just saw red. I was not going to sit there and take his holier than thow lecture again. I got up from my chair grabbed my suitcase and dog and left slamming the door behind me on the way out in the middle of the night. I have been sick about it ever since, my self esteem took a terrible beating and I have felt terrible for slamming the door. Well yes, I could have handled things differently and I was sorry for that part but I had a right to be angry. Who the hell does he think he is? After reading a ton of posts here I am feeling much better about myself.
    I have been so sick at times and really needed help, they were no where in sight. Something I can do is find my joy, I am learning to paint, God gave me a gift with art and I am learning lots. I am not great with it yet but it is my dream to be able to sell my work. My brother dumped on that idea telling me how foolish it was and to smarten up and cut it out. Who is he to tell me what my dreams should be, thank you for your support. I wonder who died and made him God.
    We grew up in a living hell together and as children all we ever really ever had was each other. We have always been close until now. I am heart broken about the whole mess and have been beating myself up mercilessly. Reading here has given me a new perspective, I don’t deserve to be treated like that all the way around. Being around my family is like drinking poison, I am so tired, so sick and tired. I am currently living with my 83 yr old Dad who needs help and being on a disability pension I cannot afford to live anywhere else. I enjoy my Dads company and like helping him out, at least I feel like I am doing some good in the world. I am finding it very difficult being so close up to this kind of dysfunction, I cannot go no contact like others have talked about here. Darlene do you have any ideas that will help me survive this better? I am open to suggestions. God bless you, I don’t know what I would have done without this safe place.

  2. By: Karen R Posted: 26th May

    Thank you so much for sharing this. Ive been working on me now for two years and I have made a lot of progress understanding what was done to me. I am 60 now and struggled all my life with low self esteem and proving my worth. I truely thought my bad coping proved mental illness. I have had issues since a out age 9.
    I now know it wasnt me. Its a slow process learning to stop punishing myself and be kind to me. I was taught to hate myself. Im getting a lot better at seeing that other’s behavior against me is about them. I still have anger but its directed at my abusers not myself. What kind of parents teach a little girl to hate herself?
    I am no contact to protect myself. Thanks to all for your enlightening comments. Karen Ranes

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 26th May

      Hi Karen!
      YAY. persistence pays off! That is what worked for me too; I just kept going forward, kept trying to stay “with me” and learned to treat myself with respect and love. (after I found out what they were!! LOL)
      love and hugs, Darlene

  3. By: Lora Posted: 22nd May

    Hi Darlene! I’m always amazed at how you post exactly what I need to hear at the right time. I too have felt like I am solving the mystery of me. Putting together a puzzle that will eventually lead to a whole, complete picture. I’m still missing some pieces and yet I feel at peace with it because I know I will find them in divine timing. I didn’t realize how many pieces of me that were shattered until I really started digging deep into my childhood.

    I feel a level of gratitude that I never felt before and it’s all towards myself. I’m grateful that I have a soul that is so determined, resilient and dedicated to my healing journey. I feel like I am beating the odds and I have been given a second chance to live my life in the way that “I” choose.

    I love when people share from their heart and soul because whether they know it or not, those are the little pieces of me that I collect and use to honor my soul. I love that I am not alone on this journey and I feel truly blessed that I am learning that life does have a purpose for me, I just need to reach out and discover it for myself.

    I have shared your site with people when I feel pulled too and I hope they find the comfort in it that I do. I think the greatest fear we all seem to have is that we are alone in this and I’m so relieved to know we are not. I am learning that all the love I ever needed was already inside of me but first I needed someone to teach me that it was there. This is where my parents failed me and I have forgiven them because I realize they were taught the same thing. Letting go of blame has given me the space for compassion, respect and honor towards myself and my parents.

    I don’t need to have my parents in my life in order to love them. I have let them go so I can save and honor my own soul. I have made peace that we were all brought together for lessons I am just beginning to discover. It is my mission now to take my learning to higher levels of understanding so I may expand my ability to love myself and others.

    This has been one hell of a ride only because I wasn’t strapped in securely; now that I have the wisdom and experience of this ride called life, I can strap in knowing I am safe and just let go and enjoy the experience. What a difference!

    Thank you Darlene for reminding me who I really am…I am a divine spark of the Universe and this little spark is going to shine as bright as she can. Namaste!

  4. By: Cindee Posted: 22nd May

    Thank you Diane for putting in words what has begun in me these past several months.
    Darlene- I am so thankful for you and your site; for your care and concern that others will find healing from abuse as you did. Thank you for doing the work and sharing your healing journey with us. You are a blessing!

  5. By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 6th February

    Cute story about your grandson! Thanks for sharing it!!
    Hugs, Darlene

  6. By: Connie Posted: 5th February

    Since this article is about inspiration and hope I wanted to share an interaction I had with my precious little 5 year old grandson this past weekend. It was a wonderful experience that validated him, and helped people were going through a very difficult emotional time. There was a local fireman who was killed in the line of duty in our small community about a week ago. It you go to this link it will explain the rest. Very uplifting and a wonderful response from the community…it even got a little blip on the local news channel:

  7. By: Debbie Posted: 6th July

    Thank you for the opportunity to share. I believe God gave me those words to share and never knew with who, or when. Fear kept me from sharing for quite awhile.Your hugs and love mean the world to me..thank you so very much. God does provide! Pray each day our journeys bring us closer to healing, hope, happiness, and a more intimate relationship with Him. Love and Hugs to all of you!

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 6th July

      Wow, that is pretty cool! I am glad that you are sharing now!
      Hugs, Darlene

  8. By: Dave Posted: 5th July

    Beautiful !!! Amazing piece of work ! Thanks for sharing ! Awesome stuff !


  9. By: Mimi Posted: 5th July

    That is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing it. It really touched my heart!! 🙂

    Love and hugs,

  10. By: Debbie Posted: 4th July

    I know I have a long way to go to emerge from the brokenness I still feel after all this time. I relate completely to so many of the comments and stories I have read here. I wanted to share a poem I wrote on 9/6/2009 that was a starting point of my healing process. I hope it may help atleast one.

    What happened to the golden rule..did it disappear
    Is this a sign of the it drawing near?

    When everywhere I glance..its someone being used
    Mis-cared for..and mis-treated..left battered and abused.

    Broken hearts and tear-filled eyes..cry out in the dark
    Hands once closed..clenched to hit their mark.

    Children shake from fear..of things that they have seen
    Grow up with such anger..that they themselves turn mean

    Hating what they have witnessed..yet life has set the stage
    for them to go on punishing…for they cant control the rage.

    Pray out loud with me..right here..right friend
    for the final curtains coming..the play is about to end.

    Show as many souls today..twice as many more tomorrow
    the day grows near we’re gonna feel the suffering and sorrow

    of friends and family left behind…cause we didn’t do the favor
    to help them open up their hearts.. to our Lord and Savior

    Don’t just speak of His mercy..His never ending love
    and how we never walk alone..when He’s watching from above

    but show testament to the fact..of how He’s always by our side
    put trust and faith in Him..allow Him to be your guide

    Lay your burdens down..release the heaviness in your heart
    allow the peace and rest He give you a fresh start

    Nothing seems so overwhelming…there’s nothing you can’t face
    when you ask God for forgiveness..and His love you can embrace

    don’t latch on to the anger…just let the hatred go
    I know you’ve hurt and been so scared..not very long ago

    But Jesus is with fact..He’s knocking on your door
    Invite Him in..accept His grace..and live in chains…NO MORE !!!

    Realizing that God loves me…even when it felt like noone else did..was the strength I needed to start heading down the right path to freedom from the war I had been fighting by myself.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.