Jun
21

Emerging from Broken Book News and my Birthday Wishes

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book photo a shrinkMy birthday is this week and I have a special request. I am about to publish the first Emerging from Broken downloadable e-book; “Emerging from Broken ~ The Beginning of Hope for Emotional Healing”  Signing the movie contract to appear as an emotional healing expert in the new self-help film “The Secrets of the Keys” got me all fired up to get my book done and I am really excited about being so close to the finish line! There is one very important thing left to accomplish on my “to do” list and it involves YOU!  

This e-book is an adaptation of the first third of the work I published here in the EFB blog and I am collecting ‘endorsements’ and any positive feedback for what I have presented in this website, for the book. I am asking my readers to post something that can be included in book itself, and for the promotion here on this page so that they are all in one place and easy for me to cut and paste into the manuscript and the other places they will be used.

For example you could share how reading my website, or the Emerging from Broken Facebook page has made a difference in your life, or how my work has impacted you on your journey. 

I am going choose several of these quotes for the inside cover of the book, some for a page on “what people are saying about Darlene Ouimet and Emerging from Broken” and some for the sales promotion.

I am going to publish a work book later this year and I will use some of these quotes, blurbs and endorsements on that book as well.

Please specify how you would like your comment to appear! If you would like just a first name, full name, screen name or anonymous please sign your comment entry that way.

If you don’t want your comment seen here on this public page, please send me your comment through the “contact” button above, exactly the way you would like to see it added to the book including your signing name. (I will use anonymous for any comments that I receive that don’t specify how they want their name to appear.)  As always, your privacy and security is most important to me.

If you would like your website or your own book mentioned, please include that in your signature after your comments~ for example, two of the people who have written endorsements signed them this way: (the endorsement itself is not included here in this post)

Mel Carnegie ~ Creator of The DeNA Revolution and Author of “I’m Still Standing” (You may include the link to your book page as well)

 Christina Enevoldsen ~ Co-Founder of Overcoming Sexual Abuse www.overcomingsexualabuse.com

Special note to Clients; if you would like to identify yourself as a client, please feel free to send me an email. I am fine with signing your blurb with just “client” and not publishing your name. If you do not want to identify yourself as a client, that is fine too! Just sign the quote, blurb or whatever you want to call it the way you would like it to appear.

Therapists, Psychologists and other mental health professionals; I will include links to your website if you have a blog or have published a book. Please don’t use this space for advertising your private practice.  

Please help me get one of my final goals accomplished on my way to publishing this book I have been working on for close to 3 years!  Who better to tell the world what EFB is about, what it means and how it impacts, than the readers themselves!

I am on target to have this first e-book published and downloadable right from this website, sometime this July or August 2014.  

I hope to have the workbook to accompany this first book finished and ready for download by September or October 2014.  

And since I started a second book while I was procrastinating about the first book, there will be another book coming sometime in the fall of 2014 or Early 2015.

If you want to be sure to receive updates about this book and future books, please sign up with your email address through the button in the right side bar by downloading the free “guide to getting unstuck on the healing journey.” 

Thanks Everyone!! I appreciate you all so much. Without the readers and the people who comment and share their own stories, this website would not be the amazing body of work that it is!

Hugs, Darlene Ouimet

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Categories : Freedom & Wholeness

85 Comments

1

Congratulations Darlene! I’ll be looking forward to it! Your blog has saved my sanity many times and has been instrumental in making positive changes in my life.
Thanks for all you do!
Big hug,
Elsie

2

I found the EFB website as a 53 year old woman who had just moved in with my mother to take care of her in her old age. Although I had no where else to go and I worked 3 months remodeling my mother’s basement, the arrangement lasted only a few months. I finally realized how abusive my mother and most of my FOO was and how it had negatively impacted me my entire life.
I have to believe I was directed to find the EFB website by a power greater than myself. Without the understanding and validation I found in Darlene’s writings and the shared experience with other visitors to these pages, I don’t know if I would have had the strength or courage to detach from by abusers. Darlene cuts right through the fuzzy cloud of denial which suffocates and enlightens by analyzing interactions through “Grid of Truth.” When you understand the Grid of Truth concept, you will start to Emerge from Broken. Thank you Darlene!

3

After yet another piece of bad treatment by my mother, I was moved one evening(after a few red wines) to google “my mother doesn’t love me”. Well, what a revelation to find the EFB website: I discovered that other people have mothers that treat them badly, and try to sabotage their lives and relationships, can’t bear to see them happy, even try to turn their own children against them. In fact, there is a whole army of people out there struggling just as I have been. This has been a tremendous support to me. It has given me the strength to feel that if my family can’t treat me with respect, well, then I just can’t have them in my life, and that is ok. As a result, I feel that a huge weight has been lifted from me, and that I have been freed to try to reach my potential, whether my mother likes it or not. Thank you. Please let me know when the book is ready as I would like to purchase a copy.

4

I have only recently begun this healing journey. It is so much harder than I ever expected, but whenever I feel ready to give up, there is a quote on Facebook from EFB that speaks to me, or I read something in the website that gives me the hope I need to keep trying–even baby steps are steps forward.

5

When ever someone would ask about my childhood I always said it was pretty good, but I had so many blank spots and could not figure out why. Thank you Darlene for all you do. I thank God that I stumbled across Emerging From Broken on Facebook. I always knew something was wrong but I could never bring myself to say of even think it might be abuse. Thank You for opening my eyes so that I can see the truth that had been hiding in brain. The blanks are filling in now and they are full of pain but what lies on the other side is worth the fight.

6

When you’ve been broken, this is a great place to go to figure out why. I highly recommend this site, because, eventually, you’ll find someone who has been thru similar experiences as you and will have a piece of the puzzle or answer that you’ve been looking for.

7

I found looking at my current boyfriend relationships didn’t go deep enough to get to the source of the pain. This is a good site for those that need support to go deep into childhood abuse to expose the truth. Its difficult to get over something if you don’t know what it is or where its coming from. Here it tells you why. The comments from others are vital. No fluff. It works for me.

8

I found Darlene’s website by chance and I am so grateful that I did. It is a bittersweet comfort to know that you are not the only person who’s spirit has been broken due to Emotional Abuse. She speaks and articulates the words and feelings that I have trouble expressing. Darlene is a blessing to me and countless others. N.A.

9
ScapegoatNoLonger
June 22nd, 2014 at 10:10 am

As the scapegoat daughter of a narcissistic mother, for decades I repressed and denied horrible memories and feelings about my abusive relationship with my mother who never loved me. When I literally woke up to the painful truth after my mother’s death several years ago, Darlene’s website was and will forever be a complete salvation for me. Thank you, Darlene, for writing fabulous, insightful articles that help the former scapegoats like me view life through a more positive, light-filled prism. You have helped me move beyond the decades of evil brainwashing by a hateful mother, and begin to THRIVE. Gratefully, ScapegoatNoLonger

10

EFB Has empowered me to truly look at the toxicity and dysfunction of my so called ‘family’. It gave me a voice to speak (anonymously) about all the horrible things that happened to me without judgement. My whole life had been about staying ‘nice’ and being silent about the abuse that happened but EFB and the acceptance I have had from you Darlene and the community of EFB has been a huge help for me in regaining my life back without the toxic shame I had been carrying for so long. XXX

11

Darlene, I don’t remember how or when I found your website, but it has been 3 years or so. I have visited your site and read some of your articles over the years, but it is not until the last few months that I have been a more regular reader.
Until my mother’s death in July of last year, I was caught up in the hope that I could figure out a way to get into my mother’s good graces and get the love that I longed for. That never happened. This last year has been a year of grief and healing for me.
I have been the scapegoat since early childhood and had no idea why I was treated so badly. My mom and my Golden Child brother were always thick as thieves. And, after my mom married my step-dad forty years ago, his daughter became the other Golden Child. Her step-daughter lived with her for thirty-nine years. It is difficult to find someone who can relate to my situation, because it is so uncommon.
But, anyway, I am reading your blog and am feeling encouraged that some day I too can emerge from broken.

12

Emerging from Broken is the first place I found where it was acknowledged that healing from abuse involved looking closely enough at the past to see what the lies were and why I believed them. I found that it was necessary to unlock the grip that the lies had on me before truth could take root in my life.

The information that this website offers is the most powerful I’ve come across because it has shown me how to get the manipulation and dishonesty out of the way so I have room to accept the truth about who I am and what I’m worth.

Hobie

13

I always knew i came out of an extremely dysfunctional family, but i didn’t realize just how deep it all went, or what steps to take in order to start healing until I found EFB . My wife and I have made more positive accomplishments in the last two years than all the previous years put together. Thank you Darlene, and God bless you forever and ever.

14

Darlene, I found your site a few days ago. I have just turned 65 and my whole life has been spent being quiet, submissive and trying to please others. Emerging From Broken taught me that I am not alone and it is okay to put my own needs first. Even though my parents have been gone for many years I still carry their fear, judgement and shame.

I honor all the young children facing this emotional abuse. It doesn’t have to last a lifetime.

15

I have been a member of Emerging From Broken for two years. It has been an absolute joy to be finally heard and validated for my past physical and emotional child abuse issues with my narcissistic mother. My father took his wife’s side and I don’t even consider him to be my father. I have been very hurt by many past so-called therapists who did not understand nor even care. The mainstream culture does not understand, nor validate victims with past severe physical abuse and emotional cruelty. Yes, sometimes those of us who had these abuse issues, without having the sexual abuse issues, have been even more traumatized than them. All of Darlene’s articles are intelligent and insightful and she always gets to the heart of the issues. Few people can actually comprehend our issues. We have been brushed off with statements such as, “you should be over this by now. Also, “I know someone who had it worse than you”. And my favorite, “you need to forgive”, without being able to really heal the past in our own sweet time. We are never validated and respected for our issues. Darlene’s site is the only online safe space that I have found. I have been totally respected and validated here. Darlene, you are truly a blessing to those of us who have been victims. The Emerging From Broken site is a safe oasis for self-healing and support.

Thanks for reading,

Yvonne

16

CONGRATULATIONS Darlene, you have given self belief to those of us who lost or never had that essential connection with our inner self because of our childhood experiences, Your words give strength and asurance to me and I always tell others with the same /similar lived experience about your writing so they can have some more support and hope for their journey in recovering from childhood trauma. . THANK YOU .

17

Finding Darlene’s Emerging From Broken when I did gave me the spark of validation and hope I needed to push through to the truth of my painful past which had up to that point only tormented me for many years. Her writing showed me that there was real freedom possible by going back to where it all began and extracting my own truth out of the lies that abuse taught me. While many self-help guides seemed to highlight unhelpful and self-blaming concepts that only triggered the emotional abuse of my family, Darlene’s empathic and inspirational writing shows a way forward that comes from a base of honoring and loving ourselves.
–Caden Ceirdris, blogger at http://proudlysensitive.wordpress.com/

18

Happy Birthday Darlene!
LOVE your comment Caden! (#17)

QUESTION – HOW did you get links embedded on this page? I had 2 prepared but they didn’t transfer to this page so I didn’t put the comment I would like to share. Help?

19

Thank you everyone for these wonderful blurbs!!! They are awesome! I really appreciate this support!

Danielle,
Just try again, maybe enter them by hand? I don’t know what happened.
Darlene

20

Happy Birthday Darlene and congratulations on your new book.

Your posts have been an inspiration to me since I began reading them. You always have something that hits home for me and I have gained a lot of courage from reading them.
Stanley

21

Darlene – Your posts on FB have been so encouraging and insightful. I have probably shared more of your posts than anything. Thank you so much for your contribution to my peace of mind and self love.

22

Darlene’s web site has given me a lot of insight into why my own upbringing was dysfunctional despite having (what appear to be) “good parents.” I grew up very confused and couldn’t figure out what I was confused about (fog). I have emerged from a fog as Darlene described.

(I don’t mind it appearing on this web site, but if you use it in your book, put me as “anonymous” or “faithful reader” or something.)

23

Here we go:

When I found Emerging From Broken four years ago, I had just had a great falling out with family when confronting them about my mother’s abuse. My mother’s abuse was awful – gaslighting was her favourite thing to do along with all the other classics. For years I was convinced that her abuse of me really was my fault which made me feel like the worst of human beings – no worth, no confidence – I ended up being nothing but a walking void. (I went no contact from my mother well over a decade ago.) I don’t even recall how I found Darlene’s site, but its the first time I found the term, NPD, or Narcissistic Personality Disorder and for the first time, I could see objectively that my mother’s abuse of me was about her, not me. This site aided in my healing in ways that I would have never have otherwise gotten. The blinders came off, the veils were lifted, and bonds were broken. Finding Emerging From Broken and being able to read and meet others who had experiences like mine helped me to see that I wasn’t the crazy one after all.

Choosing Joy … blogger at http://www.reclaimingalife.wordpress.com

24

Oh man – I forgot something … here’s the revision …

When I found Emerging From Broken four years ago, I had just had a great falling out with family when confronting them about my mother’s abuse. My mother’s abuse was awful – gaslighting was her favourite thing to do along with all the other classics. For years I was convinced that her abuse of me really was my fault which made me feel like the worst of human beings – no worth, no confidence – I ended up being nothing but a walking void. I went no contact from my mother well over a decade ago – and I have now been strict no contact for about 4 years with all family of origin. I don’t even recall how I found Darlene’s site, but its the first time I found the term, NPD, or Narcissistic Personality Disorder and for the first time, I could see objectively that my mother’s abuse of me was about her, not me. This site aided in my healing in ways that I would have never have otherwise gotten. The blinders came off, the veils were lifted, and bonds were broken. Finding Emerging From Broken and being able to read and meet others who had experiences like mine helped me to see that I wasn’t the crazy one after all.

Choosing Joy … blogger at http://www.reclaimingalife.wordpress.com

25

Happy Birthday and Congratulations!

Reading your articles and columns has made me appreciate my Blessings even more. We cannot change the past but we do have the power to change the present and impact our futures. We Own Our Life Journeys. From your posts I learned how not to live in the land of depression but to pick myself up and begin to do positive things for me. In this fashion my life has now changed for the better. Thank you.
http://dancingpalmtrees.com/

26

Happy B-day, Darlene! I hope you have a good year.

EFB has been key to my understanding of the inequities that existed in my family. Darlene and the community she has fostered have taught me that I matter. I am no less important than any other being and was not born to forfeit myself to someone else’s interest. Darlene’s work is clear-sighted, compassionate and courageous. Her words have been integral to my healing and I will be forever grateful for what I’ve learned here.

27

Alaina, if I didn’t appreciate what you have written so much, I would be jealous of your ability to put words together so well!

Yeah Darlene – what she said 🙂 (Alaina – #26 – that one!)

Hobie

28

Thank you Darlene! Here goes…

I discovered Darlene while doing research about childhood trauma and its effects for my book. I was finally stepping out to tell my story and some hidden things came to light. I had a great amount of difficulty shaking off the self-blame for the things that happened to me as a child. Even though my situation was very different from Darlene’s I saw that I suffered many things she spoke of. I found Darlene very kind, validating & empowering. She finds a way to encourage everyone who posts on her website. She greatly encouraged me.
Danielle Bernock – author of “Emerging With Wings”
http://www.emergingwithwings.com

29

One link made it but the title of my book was suppose to have this link embedded in it
https://www.createspace.com/4756209
It is a link to my book. Can you connect it?
and
Thank you for all your encouragement Darlene!

30

EFB changed my life at age 66.

More than just another “misery loves company” forum, Darlene and EFB participants offer truthful insights into how to make oneself whole, even without a loving family.

31

I always thought it was me. It was my fault. It had to be. Everybody told me it was. How could they all be lying. Of course I finally learnt, through Darlene’s information,that I was the scapegoat. I was an easy target for anybody as it had been drummed into me that is was ME. I now beginning a new life at 57.

32

Hi Darlene,,, this post can be used in reference to your book, wherever you feel it most applies.

When I first discovered Emerging From Broken, I was looking for a site that would relate on a level of healing and positive feedback. Darlene’s experiences and the healing from abusive relationships, has many similarities to my own life journey. I have felt uplifted and affirmed in many of her posts about her own discoveries and recovery. My gratitude for her willingness to share her journey and EFB continues to grow.
— deJoly LaBrier, Author of All Together Now; A Multiple’s Story of Hope and Healing, and Diary of a Survivor in Art And Poetry; http://www.dejoly.com

33

Darlene’s work in Emerging From Broken has meant a lot to my recovery and continued growth from my personal childhood sexual abuse. It was not by chance that I was searching the internet on day some years ago and discovered her blog. The article transformed my life and allowed me a place where I could share, for the first time, my sexual abuse story. It is a safe harbor for me now as it was then. And through EFB I have become free of so many issues that are familiar to childhood and other sexual abuse survivors. In so many ways, Darlene has saved my life by helping my discover my true self through her work.

(Please include my name in your post and my information)

Christimesministries.com

34

Having suffered with depression, anxiety attacks, PTSD … etc. I had seen several different therapists throughout my life. NONE of these professionals had as profound of an impact on my recovery as the work Darlene has done through Emerging from Broken. EFB has been the kind of validation I had been searching for my whole life. It gave me hope, being able to have someone to relate to & see that it IS possible to overcome the cycle of abuse, for myself and for my children. Thank you, Darlene (and the Ouimet family for sharing her), for all of the time and energy put into giving hope to so many! Most especially, thank you for helping in my recovery from a lifetime of covert abuse.

KR

35

Darlene-

I am so glad I found EFB. Your amazing way of helping people is truly a gift. The validation I have felt when reading your articles and other people’s posts have meant so much to me. Thank you for all you do for those seeking freedom.

Andria

36

Congratulations Darlene! Wishing you a wonderful birthday!

Here’s what I have to say about EFB. You can use my online name (Alice) for the book if you wish to include it.

My mother emotionally abused me and sometimes hit me. I was emotionally neglected and my feelings growing up were pretty much always “wrong” and I was punished for them. I’ve tried many forms of therapy over the years but none of them work as well as recognizing the truth about the way I was mistreated by my family, but especially by my mother. My mother was able to get away with this abuse for years because of the way that mothers garner immediate respect in our society. As a result I was often silenced when I wanted to talk about the way I was treated.

EFB provides a safe forum for people who have had abusive families to speak honestly about the way they were mistreated and the many ways in which this mistreatment has affected their lives.

37

I’m so happy for you!! This will help so many and it’s definitely helped me! I will be the first to order your book!

38

Dear Darlene
Your blogs have helped me gain perspective and insight into a difficult family situation. You have helped me heal from chronic guilt and responsibility for things that were not my fault and which I could not change. I am profoundly grateful for your work.
All best
Elizabeth

39

Dear Darlene,
For as long as I could remember, I have been trying to crack the code to figure out what it is about me that causes people to treat me the way they do. In other words, what is so wrong with me that causes people to bully me, take advantage of me, talk down to me and treat me as if my existence is solely for them to benefit from. And I could never crack that code. Trying to alter my behavior to fit the way they wanted me to be, trying to be of service to them, trying to do everything I could do to please them: none of it worked. None of it got me the respect or love from people who didn’t want to give it to me.

I found EFB a little over a year ago. I began reading Darlene’s blogs, and for the first time, it occurred to me that I could question things. In particular, I could question the devaluing things that were done to me by certain people all my life. Mean words that I always accepted as true, my place in my family of origin that I had accepted unquestioningly, my feelings of being inferior to other people, being blamed and treated as a scapegoat. All of these things, for the first time, were now being questioned by me. Darlene’s blogs opened my eyes to the grooming process used to get kids to comply and not question things. And to the survival mechanisms we learned in childhood, and continued to use in adulthood.( though they should have been left behind). And her blogs led to understanding my feelings, what they are, and why I was afraid to give voice to them. I feel I have come a long way in a year, but also know I have a long way to still go. But I am optimistic, because for the first time so much finally makes sense to me. And all because I now know that there is another way of looking at my past.

Thank you Darlene for all you do. You are an inspiration and guiding light for thousands.

Gratefully,
Amber

40

Discovering EFB three years and reading all your blogs and comments from others has helped me realize that I am not alone.You have also helped me realize that I DO NOT have to accept abuse in any form no matter if it comes from my parents or someone else. I have lived my life trying to please others while burying my hopes and dreams,never asking for anything for myself. I have let people walk all over me and never defended or spoke up for myself.I thought I needed my mother to validate me and everything I have felt. Because of you,Darlene and EFB I only need to validate myself, I speak up for myself now,I know how to do self care and do not feel guilty about that anymore.You have given me the ability to allow myself to dream and hope again. And for that I am eternally grateful to you!!

Thank you,from the bottom of my heart,
Diane

41

The writing of this book, is a gift to those raised in chaotic homes with any type of abuse. Since reading the site, your Facebook posts, I’m learning to walk away from hurtful, and unsafe people.

Grieving what I never had was harder-for me answers were more spiritual, but I believe as do other friends who I’ve passed this link to, that as I’ve mentioned it, what EMB does that’s others don’t.

I never had healthy or nurturing parents. And I’m learning that now. To be my own. That the abuses, the lies, drinking, drugging, sabotaging my personal and professional life, that not only is that not my fault or problem.

As such my current efforts don’t include trying to gain love or approval from those incapable of any of it.

And it’s allowed me to pick friends who are family. And they behave like it. Love, compassion, continued mutual respect, grace-come with truth.

42

And of course, Happy Birthday!!!!

43

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLENE!!
I hope that your special day is as awesome as you are! 🙂 🙂

44

Happy birthday! I want to say that many times you share something and it’s exactly what I need at that moment. It’s helped me heal and recover. Thank you and congratulations on your new book.

45

I have read every self-help book on the market; about codependency, emotional abuse, physical abuse etc. etc. But YOU speak directly to my soul. It recognizes a kindred spirit! Thank you!!

46

Darlene has held my hand and encouraged me through a difficult journey of recovery and healing when no one else was there for me.The issues that she discusses have traveled directly to my heart and have helped heal it.
Thank you Darlene for your bravery and your generosity to me and countless others .

47

Thank you for blessing me with your openness and transparency <3 You aided me in feeling less alienated and alone, and you helped me validate my perceptions and insights when it came to my upbringing. I attempt to honor your courage and strength daily by moving forward and not allowing my ugly past to mire and hinder me. You are a Godsend and I am very appreciative of you!

48

Happy Birthday, Darlene! Your work had a huge impact on my life. Your writing gave me the validation I needed to embrace the truth about my life and break away from those who kept me bound by lies designed to protect their abusive secrets. I found freedom and self-acceptance through your willingness to share your painful but victorious road to recovery. I will always be thankful for Emerging From Broken. Your bravery is contagious! Love you.
Pam

49

EFB helps me to know that I am not alone. I am not set apart, I am not fatally flawed. And wholeness is a possibility everyday. I really like the clarity with which you communicate, Darlene. You have taken the pain and alienation you were given and transformed it into loving connection. Where everyone is welcome. One of the things I struggled with on other websites and forums is this feeling of alienation we feel is so hard to breech and we communicate our unreachability, our alien-ness almost as something we are addicted to. Many other places have an air of being resigned to brokenness. You have overcome that inclination and, at least for me, made healing more accessible. Thank you for forging a path and being a guide.

50

And Happy Birthday!

51

Dear Darlene,

The most significant thing that I believe you do that makes your work so helpful is that you focus on the importance of validating the reality of our experiences and the pain and damage that they caused. Most of the time we are used to rushing through the acknowledgement that something bad actually happened to us, and we are urged “not to dwell on it”. Yet, I’ve begun to find that dwelling WITH it is the KEY to actually becoming free of it. It’s in finding all the ways that the tentacles of abuse reach into all the areas of our thinking and our lives that we have the ability to respond in ways that are genuinely healing. It makes all the difference! Thank you!

Hobie

52

I found your website I am so in awe of your bravery and how far you have come. You have inspired and comforted me in so many ways. I think you are a trail blazer and very thankful I found you. I hope many more will find you just at the right time, like myself. Much love Susan X

53

Happy Birthday Darlene.
I appriciate your strength.

I gained a real sense of peace from knowing I was no longer alone

Thankyou

54

Darlene,
I Thank you for Starting me on my Journey to Unbroken. I’ve read, learned, applied, and restarted my Life from the very beginning, baby Kelly. I am very fortunate that I’ve been Given the Tools by You to heal what I thought could not be healed.
I am Happy, Healthy, and Secure! I am Still on my Journey as there will be more things that come to the surface and I’m ready to deal with those, too!
Thanks Again!
Kelly Savoie

55

Where do I start? Darlene’s posts have saved my life. I have been forced in a way to deal with several abuses from my childhood. To peel the layers away has been so powerful and painful. I was at such a low when I found her website, but now I have a better sense of who I am. Getting to know me, I found out I like me. I feel this would not have been possible without Darlene sharing her life’s journey.

56

Several years ago, I was desperate for help. I had been to therapists in the past who did not understand how to help me. Late one night, a few years ago, I was searching the internet for one last attempt when I discovered EFB. I was given encouragement, a voice, validation, and tools to use from Darlene and this site. Approximately a year later I suddenly was able to put the pieces of my entire life together and I was healed. I was finally free. I was able to find my self and where I belonged in this world. I cannot ever express my gratitude enough or praise for what Darlene has accomplished!

Happy Happy Birthday Darlene! I look forward to hearing all about your much deserved accomplishments. This is a thrilling time and I love hearing about them. xoxoxo

57

Hope your birthday was grand!

58

As a survivor of years of childhood sexual abuse, Darlene and the Emerging From Broken website has been my BEST resource for healing. Over the years, I have seen several therapists but no one helped me to articulate my feelings/needs like Darlene. She also has helped me to realize sexual abuse wasn’t the only abuse I suffered and that I CAN heal from ALL of it. I not only can but I deserve to heal and be happy. Empowerment for survivors at its best!

59

The Emerging from Broken website has been key to my recovery from the isolation and pain I was dealing with after being rejected by family for voicing against abuse. The patterns of abusive treatment & the methods used to control us into silence are the same worldwide – and I don’t think i would have made it through this far without Darlene’s daily dedication to making us aware of this.
Thank you Darlene
MARIA BINNIE

60

Dear Darlene,

I hope you can use something in my words below or at least know how much you and your work mean to me.

Your website and work on Facebook have helped me make positive life changes that I’ve worked on for most of my life, but with greater success and lasting impact than I was able to achieve throughout my life.

You have an unparalleled ability to express seemingly simple concepts about abusive relationships, self respect, healing and so many other things, that eluded me for so long, and yet with your eloquent choices of words, things register in my brain in a powerful and helpful way I’ve rarely experienced in life.

In my opinion, you also have an amazing ability to spot the truly key issues in comments from readers on EFB and respond in ways that clearly demonstrate that you understand, and validate us, our feelings and thoughts.

The validation you provide to me makes it seem almost as though you are able to read my thoughts, as you so clearly understand the struggles so many of us endure.

You demonstrate repeatedly and tirelessly, and so bravely, what you have been through in your life, and provide proof and encouragement to us that if you can do it (heal), we can do it too; and we can, and we do!

Through your work and EFB and on Facebook, you manage to provide a nurturing, supportive, intelligent environment where people can feel and be safe, and find the tools and support so many of us need to finally progress on our own healing journeys.

Your loving and gentle ways and concern for fellow humans shines through in all you do and you are truly an inspiration to me, and I can’t thank you enough for doing what you do.

Almost 2 years into reading EFB I am finally, 47 years into my life, starting to feel better in every aspect of my life, my marriage, my career, friendships, and so on.

Thank you sincerely Darlene and cheers to you and best wishes for continued success, as well as health, peace and happiness.

Sincerely,

Dave Smith

61

I found “Emerging from Broken” right after confronting my mother of the horrible physical/mental abuse from her.
I was having unbearable flashbacks all triggered from her constantly trying to rewrite history making herself as this perfect mother.
The truth was she was she was a violent unpredictable ragaholic who beat me with whatever she could while calling me disgusting names no parent should call their kids & has uttered an apology her entire life.
Speaking the truth provoked her to tell all I was having false memories and mentally ill..and my “dad” ONLY molested me because I was sneaking into his bed all the time..which is SO sick!
(NEVER HAPPENED ONCE!)
Her above response allowed her to totally erase EVERYTHING that ever happened to me in one paragraph.
Unfortunately her excuse is SO typical to children abused that it did not surprise me whatsoever.
How she lives with her lies is beyond my thinking abilities.
EFB speaks of this phenomena & confirmed to me so many deep beliefs I had already known & completely validated my reasons for doing what I did so I could heal myself from all the trauma I kept buried.
I learned that in telling the TRUTH it has set me FREE..but first I had to be willing to release all dysfunctional roles given..all the illusions I had made myself believe from a little girl in order to survive & SEE reality for once in my life which there is NO greater gift than having the blinders off for once in my life.
Darlene is an angel who speaks to those of us who were abused in every way..not loved or nurtured from abusers who will never have remorse or accountability..and puts the shame & guilt where it belongs~Back to the ABUSERS..not us.
Her words are ours.
I am forever grateful to her courage in speaking out & helping the broken become whole again. 🙂

62

I am not sure how long Emerging From Broken had been a blog when I met Darlene and Carla and started following them here. I have been honored to watch Darlene and Emerging From Broken grow and help so many survivors who struggle to do their own healing work. I follow the blog and also her Facebook page and often share both of them with my readers on Facebook and occasionally on my own blog for my readers to learn from. The blog and Facebook page have grown quicker than any other sites that I know of for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. They are growing because the work that Darlene does is so important to survivors around the globe. I am excited to see that her work has grown into an e-book and an extended crowd of survivors.
Patricia Singleton: Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker @ http://patriciasingleton.blogspot.com

63

Happy belated birthday, Darlene! I found you a couple of months ago and I read through tears, I see my own experience, I immediately feel less cursed / isolated / scared / defective / wrong. What a gift to humanity you have made of your pain. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. In my own life, you are nothing short of a gift from God, because when I prayed for help, when I shouted, “Hey, whoever you are — I’m done,” I found you. When I feel myself sliding down that hole of, “See what a jerk you are, Melissa?” I remember the things I read from this community, I breathe, and I try to love myself. It’s working. I am so grateful for the work of Darlene Ouimet and her community!!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY and I can’t wait for the book.

64

Darlene Ouimet leads the way with her candor, honesty, and detailed account of her own struggles with her family of origin. This in turn helps her readers to be brave enough to confide their own stories and to seek strength from one another. Darlene also has been instrumental in challenging the stigma that we must love and respect our elders at all costs, and if a child (including an adult child) is unhappy or angry, then it’s automatically the child’s fault. She turns this idea on its head and makes it safe to reclaim ourselves and speak out.

Darlene’s amazing ability to identify unhealthy dynamics and provide insight, and then make it all readable is a precious gift that has impacted the world over.

Happy Birthday, Darlene! Please sign me anonymous if you use my blurb. Thank you.

65

Emerging From Broken has helped me begin to acknowledge and process an incredibly traumatic upbringing under patriarchy. Emotional, physical, and mental abuse are all too easily ignored and invalidated. Darlene is amazing at bringing truth and light to these areas of darkness. Her honesty has helped me be honest with myself and begin the healing process.

66

I am overwhelmed with gratitude and touched by these amazing comments about me, my work and the way my message is being received! Thank you so much to everyone. I feel validated and supported. I feel loved and I feel heard! It’s a fabulous feeling! 🙂

I have already collected 7 pages of endorsements that were sent to me through email. I am going to add these to those this week! I am working on finishing the introduction pages for the book this weekend. The cover is being designed and it is going to be beautiful! It’s getting really exciting as I get closer to the finish line!

I will also be posting a new blog post/article within the next two days so stay tuned!
Hugs, Darlene

67

I just saw this, and it may be too late – but even if it’s just for your eyes, here’s my contribution! It is long, but I had a lot to say! 🙂

I had been working towards healing from a lifetime of narcissistic abuse and scapegoating by my mother (although I was just figuring out that that’s what had been going on) when I came across Darlene’s website. Reading her posts gave me such a strong feeling of validation that these things HAD happened, that they HAD affected me greatly, and that it was NOT my fault and DEFINITELY NOT a reflection of my worthiness as a human being. As I kept reading, I became stronger in my conviction that I was a good person who had been through difficult things, and the coping methods I’d come up with as a child (like my eating disorder) were for a good reason. Darlene has been my cheerleader, assuring me that I’m worth it, that I deserve good things, and pumping me up to the point where I can pump my fist into the air and cheer myself on, moving forward in my healing and in my life. I can’t say enough what a difference her writings have made in my life.

I have read many things and sought help from many professionals in the past three years, and a common message from all of them is that my parents did the best they could, and that they love me in their own way, that they are not perfect and I should not expect them to be, and that I should be grateful for the good things and forgiving of the bad. I have not found any of this to be helpful at all. In fact, every time I heard this I would slide back into my eating disorder, my depression, my feelings of self-hatred, etc. Darlene is the ONLY voice that I’ve had in my recovery who questions all of that. Who says that they did the best they could? That’s just crap! That idea alone has been so affirming for me.

Darlene has been 100% on my side. She’s never tried to excuse my parents’ behaviour towards me. She’s never tried to convince me that what I experienced from them was love. She’s always on my side, validating my emotions, believing my experiences, and telling me that I deserved better (and still do).

All of this is just from reading her posts – what a gift that someone can be such a positive influence in your life simply through sharing her experiences in writing.

Thank you, Darlene!

68

Darlene,
You saved my life. I can’t minimize that truth. It’s no mistake that in my very darkest hours, I saw a link to your page on the sideline of my FB page. That’s where I began my journey. I started out with so many questions. I submerged myself in the writings of EFB, and there is where I found my truth. I can’t thank you enough for the courage you’ve had to share your story in order to reach others. I’m over three years into my process now, and I might not have survived it without the 24 hour support of your page. I am happy and thriving now, and free of the FOG. I thought I’d never be here, but, is held onto your words. They came true. Thank you from the bottom of my heart Darlene. You are changing the face of abuse.
Love to you,
Mimi

69

Darlene & everyone else – I wish I simply go through here & “like” your posts like on Facebook. So many people. So many different stories. Thank you Darlene for your courage & voice that is helping so many. Thank you to those who post/share as you add to that help. I recently directed my niece to this site. She & I have much in common but much different also. Together we all can help each other because “Not everything helps everyone but everyone has something to offer to help.” (Emerging With Wings)
I’m glad you feel our love Darlene & I look forward to your book.

70

Darlene is a life saver! My whole life I felt that I was the problem child. After finding Darlene’s website, I realized that the problem was not with me, but with my abusive parents. What a difference that belief system makes! I am new to this type of healing process, and already I feel better. I could not have done it without Darlene’s help and stories about her struggles as a child. She is an awesome woman!

71

Hi Darlene, I was a very troubled soul when I first found your blog in December 2012. I’ve been quietly reading your blog ever since. Although I never commented before but I kept coming to this blog whenever I felt BROKEN. I stay in India which is in another part of the world than where you stay and culturally very different from your country, but every word you say here resonates with me. Truth is the same everywhere!

I find your blog really very special because of the way u expose the truth….. You straightaway speak to our hearts!

I think you are the first person to validate my feelings!!! Thank you so much!! I’ve changed quiet a bit as a person since I started reading your blog ! I feel more like me because of the courage I found here to be myself !

72

Hi Everyone!
I am going to be collecting these quotes for about another 5 days. (but I am going to be publishing another book in the fall, so some of these and any new ones will go to the next book) I am overwhelmed with gratitude and my heart if overflowing from all the amazing comments here! hugs, Darlene

P.S. there is a new post this week on the home page ~ “When Society defends abuse and abusers instead of the abused child” http://emergingfrombroken.com/when-society-defends-abuse-and-abusers-instead-of-the-abused-child/

73

I would like to tell you a short story. I was a single mon for 18 ywars until I remarried 25 years ago. My son was 3 years old when his dad left. He has not seen or talked to him since the day he left. My son is now 47 years old with three children. He had no roll model, but he is a super dad, husband and business man. He owns a multi million business.

This past Father’s Day I wanted to write him a note from me telling him how proud I am of him and how much I love his family.

I was lost for words. I checked the internet and found your site. Thank you for your suggestions on how to write what you feel from your heart.

I was so pleased when I finished the letter. My son was very moved when he read the letter.

I have really enjoyed your web site.

Thank you

Linda Baccus

74

Darlene. I cannot wait for the details of your book, please keep us posted! Please know how much your website has helped me. It’s a place of comfort and somewhere to go to read your great articles and see how many people share the same problems. Often with bad childhood we feel so alone and this is a place to come to know you are not alone and others are dealing with similar issues. We come here and gather together to share our struggles and gain support, compassion and know we are not alone. This website has been a lifesaver for me.

75

Congrats Darlene on all your successes with your web site. So happy for you!

I can’t remember how I discovered your web site, somehow it made it onto my face book page one day. I was already well on my way to my own healing journey and your articles were like the missing pieces I needed to validate my own truths. The way you broke down the dysfunctional playouts we have with our families has really helped me see more clearly what damage has been caused to my self esteem.

The ride can be very bumpy at times and having a safe place to come to when I feel discouraged has helped me a great deal. What a comfort to know I am not alone or crazy with how I feel inside. I appreciate all your insights and they always give me hope. Thank you for sharing your gifts with all of us. Namaste!

76

Hi Darlene,

I have been a reader of the blog for many years. I can attest to the power of the articles that shed clear light on the issues and help me to grow and change. In several instances I found just the key I needed to go to the depth of my pain and injustices. This blog has been one of my valued sources in my many years of healing. Thank you!!
Kathryn

77

Thank you so much EVERYONE who left a comment here.

When I gathered up all the comments that were sent to me through here and through email, the total was over 150 of them and they were all so amazing it took me 2 full days to decide which one’s to use where!(it was a really great problem to have though.. and I was overwhelmed with gratitude and the realization that my original dream and goal ~ to touch lives with my message of hope and healing ~ had come true!

I added about 7 pages of these gift quotes to the book, but that was only about 35 comments, which we selected for their unique message and variety of expression.

I will be using the rest for promotion and maybe even some of them in the second book (which is going to be a collection of the middle years worth of my work; all the hard stuff, family stuff etc) and there will be a workbook to follow as well.

Thank you all so much! Anything posted here after this comment will be collected for the next book.

One last exciting bit of news!! I sent my manuscript to Best selling author and personal development expert Brain Tracy and he sent me a testimonial quote which I am going to use on the book cover!

I just sent the final changes to my editor!! Stay tuned!

hugs, Darlene

79

This website has been a blessing for me. I am learning so much. I find validation hete.

80

Hi Everyone!
I just found out yesterday that the sign up for the free download “guide to getting unstuck” booklet has not been working properly for weeks now! It has been fixed, so if you didn’t get your copy, please get one. (See the form on the Upper Right Side bar here in the blog)

This will also add you to the my email list and you will be notified when I have important news such as when the E-Book “The Beginning of Hope for Emotional Healing” will be available.. and it is in the process of being formatted and should be available by the end of next week!

Hugs, Darlene

81

Well my e-book is finally available! Please read carefully ~ this is NOT A HARD COPY book ~ people have been buying it expecting it to be shipped but it isn’t that kind of book! You can download it to read on the computer, or iPad or other e-reader platforms, but it won’t be shipping.
The cool thing about downloading on your computer or laptop is that the titles are linked back to the discussions on those topics here in the website!

AFTER you buy it, Please read the instructions carefully again! you are required to register for the download.. this is to keep the book safe.

Thanks everyone!
hugs, Darlene

82

Question – keep the book safe from what?

(Sorry if it seems a dumb question.)

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Hi Danielle
No it’s a perfectly acceptable question 🙂

Having it delivered this way disables people from sharing or from uploading it to their own websites. (I have trouble all the time with people duplicating my blog posts and leaving my name and website out of them) This security feature is to protect my investment in all of this as well.

Does that answer your question?
hugs, Darlene

84

Yes it does. Thank you. ????

I didn’t know that was possible. It is sad that people do that. ????

85

Ya it is sad…

By the way everyone ~ you can print the e-book when it is downloaded. especially if you want to take notes right on it!
hugs, Darlene

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