Positional Power ~ When Your Therapist Doesn’t Get It

Child abuse and neglect result in low self-esteem, depression and a whole lot of other issues. Part of the grooming process that occurs in ALL abuse including emotional abuse and psychological abuse is that the blame is transferred to the child and in order to cope and survive children accept that blame and focus inward … Continue reading "Positional Power ~ When Your Therapist Doesn’t Get It"

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My Article has been Published in TILT Magazine!

A couple of months ago I was invited by DeeAnna Nagel and Kate Anthony from Online Therapy Institute to submit an article to TILT magazine  (TILT stands for “Therapeutic Innovations in Light of Technology“) and the issue that my article has been featured in has been published! A lot of my readers are coaches and therapists and … Continue reading "My Article has been Published in TILT Magazine!"

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The Reason People don’t Hear what You are Trying to Say

That night I came home and burst into the house excitedly telling my husband Jim that his father was an abuser! I stated something like “I know what is wrong in our lives…YOUR father is an abuser!” My husband looked shocked and then he started to look angry. I started to explain what I was learning about how people misuse their power to overpower others and my husband Jim was looking at me like I was nuts! This was HIS father....

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A day in the Life of Darlene ~ Recognizing the Origin of Self Blame

“It wasn’t just that I didn’t know what I was feeling; I was also afraid to acknowledge my feelings in case they were wrong. Survival for me had become about making sure that I didn’t do or say the wrong thing”. Darlene Ouimet This morning my husband needed me to pick him up at one … Continue reading "A day in the Life of Darlene ~ Recognizing the Origin of Self Blame"

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Thanksgiving and Gratitude ~ when the little voice rebels

It is Thanksgiving weekend in Canada and I have been thinking about gratitude these past few days in relation to the past and the present.  I had been in the process of ‘trying’ to heal a lot longer than I have been in the actual process of healing and I have many new insights today … Continue reading "Thanksgiving and Gratitude ~ when the little voice rebels"

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Choosing Like Minded Friends and the Belief System

I decided to do a search on Google using the key words “belief system” and one of the first things that came up was the instruction to “challenge your belief system” (not much instruction on “how to do the how”) But one of the suggestions on challenging your belief system struck me as odd; it … Continue reading "Choosing Like Minded Friends and the Belief System"

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Smile ~ An Example of Belief System Formation

Hearing this stuff made things far worse for me. Hearing their judgments increased my fear of being rejected and of being thrown away. Hearing this stuff confirmed that something WAS wrong with me, (just as I already suspected) and that I wasn’t good enough or worthy enough. If only I could just pretend to be happy and remember to smile. I couldn’t force myself to smile and that make me feel like a failure. My belief system was well on the way to cementing the self blame.

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