What “Freedom Rocks” Means to Me by Lauralee Hunter Rivet


This week I am excited to introduce a new EFB community event called “Freedom ROCKS” Today Lauralee shares her story about what Freedom ROCKS means to her.  For more information about Freedom ROCKS and how you can participate see the Freedom ROCKS about page. The first global Freedom Rocks event will be held the weekend of May 12 and 13th.  Darlene Ouimet~ founder of Emerging from Broken

What “Freedom Rocks” Means to Me by Lauralee Hunter Rivet

Freedom Rocks

Freedom ROCKS ~ Lauralee

Nobody grows up wishing their life would be hell; we expect it to be normal. Well, mine wasn’t. Let’s just say I went to hell and back MANY times. My life was never normal; I grew up around drugs, alcohol and had an incestuous father who molested me. I remember wanting to die, and yes I did try to die but I guess God didn’t want me yet. I hated God at times for putting me in this situation, I blamed him. But that was wrong, because no matter how bad your life is and I can attest to this 100%, you CAN get out of it. There is ALWAYS a way. I never turned to drugs and alcohol, I got off the merry go round and so can you.

I thought of the throwing the rock idea one day after my brother died on October 30th, 2011. The “family” called me, hours later of course, to tell me about my brother. I met with my mother and sister first; after 10 years without any contact with them it was hard. I cried, went to the funeral home, paid for the funeral and then I was in “mother” role again like I had been all my young adult life. I took care of my mother, slept there with her, moved her to a new apartment and took care of her for a month. Then the drama started. My sister who likes to call me princess, I think she has a lot of jealousy towards me, (she is the eldest and I am the youngest one in my family) would talk about my mother and my mother would talk about her and I felt like I had just gone to a gun fight armed with a knife. I was back to the same crap as before. I couldn’t do it anymore; I was done with being talked about and used.

Finally I said to my “mother”; “if you knew I was dying would you come to my house this year for Christmas or would you go to my sister’s?”  She said “well obviously to yours” then I said “well call your daughter and tell her you’ll be at my place”

Her response was silence at first, then the big excuses. And that is when I knew I had spent 10 years, waiting, wanting, hoping and wishing my mother could just love me and validate certain things. Thank God this all happened; not my brother dying of course but the rest and it may sound crazy but it made me FINALLY realize that it`s just NEVER going to happen. I no longer waste time hoping and wishing for that. I don’t need negative toxic people in my life.

So I thought about how I could get rid of certain people in my life and out of my mind. The first thing that came to mind was the thought of tying a key to a rock and then throwing it in the river, lake, ocean or whatever body of water is close signifying closing the door and throwing away the key. Then I thought about pollution, so I dropped the key idea and am going to write on the rock (I may need the Berlin wall haha) the names of all the toxic people that I no longer want in my life and mind.

On the weekend of Freedom ROCKS (May 12th and 13th  2012) I am going to take my rock, say a little prayer, think about why I am doing this and then release the rock and all of my emotions towards those people and be free of them. Now this may sound crazy to some people but for me it’s a way of releasing that bond and getting rid of the negativity of certain people.

After I throw my freedom rock into the water, I going to stand back and take a deep breath and let myself feel the weight of the world fall off of my shoulders. I am not sure what type of emotions I will feel; I will keep all of you posted of course but I am sure that the emotions will be strong. I look forward to the day this happens. I am taking my daughters and husband with me to watch and experience this with me. This “throwing of the rock” is very important for me; some may say “well it`s not going to change anything in your life” but they are wrong, for in my mind, and the mind is pretty strong, it will change my life. All those toxic people will be at the bottom of the river for me, where they can never hurt me again.

As I said, I promise to keep you posted here on Emerging from Broken to let you know how it felt and went for me.

Throwing the “freedom rock’ can and will have a million different meanings for other people;  as long as it brings you comfort and releases some anger, resentment, bitterness or hurt then it did its job for you.

I wish all of you nothing but peace, happiness and love in your lives, and remember ~ YOU CAN.

A very wise lady here on Emerging from Broken gave me an AHA moment during one of the low points in my life; She told me a story about the crab in the bucket; The crab is trying to crawl out, to get up and away but the other crabs are just pulling it back down because they don’t want anyone to escape to the freedom they themselves would love to have. All the crabs clamoring to get some freedom, each one pulling the other one down as they try to rise higher themselves.

I realized that the crabs were my family. I managed with perseverance to get myself out of that bucket and run as fast as my little legs would take me. I am the little crab that could, the little crab that did and the little crab that would. Thank you once again for that visualization Darlene, you are the best.

Lauralee Hunter Rivet

As always, please feel free to leave your comments for Lauralee or about what Freedom ROCKS could mean to you.  For more information about Freedom ROCKS and how you can participate see the Freedom ROCKS “about page” here. Stay tuned for more posts and info in the next week or so ~ Darlene

Related Posts “My Mother doesn’t love me and the Process of Grieving”

The greatest Adventrue is Healing


Categories : Freedom Rocks



YOU GO MAMA!!! I love you 6,000 miles past heaven xoxo


Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to add that on the day I throw my rock or boulder, I will be playing a special song. Some of you may already have heard it, by Shania Twain called TODAY IS YOUR DAY. Because it will be my day, and your day too, and NOBODY can take that away from us!

Peace, hugs and love to all of you,

P.S. And to think we were always told by our parents not to throw rocks, haha how ironic!


Hi Natasha!
Welcome to emerging from broken! I am going to assume by your last name that you are related to Lauralee! It is wonderful that you are commenting in support!
Hugs, Darlene

Music holds so much significance for me too.
All through my process I hummed and sang that song “Nobody’s gonna break my stride, nobody’s gonna hold me down” and I used it to calm and reassure myself.

When I do “take back” things that involve letting go of or standing up to other people, I very often think of that song by Pink “well so what, I’m still a rock star, I got my rock moves and I don’t need you and guess what, I’m having more fun, now that we’re done…….”
I like your song choice too.
Thank you for sharing your story for freedom ROCKS! I am looking forward to the event itself and to hearing about how it feels!
Hugs, Darlene


It’s finally out there and the day is coming!! I’m so excited for you/us!! I love your picture too. It’s cute as a button!! I’ve been thinking of you a lot lately and hoping you’re doing well. I will definitely be thinking of you on the weekend of FREEDOM ROCKS!! Thank you for this fantastic idea and for sharing your story. I still haven’t found my rock, but I WILL!!! I guarantee it!!
Love to you,
PS-music is my thing too. Always has been.


I’ve just discovered and shared this on my FB fanpage!

I “took back” and let go of some things in an unusual way. A few years ago, I wrote everything on a sheet of paper. Things that have devastated me, hurt me, confused me, etc., and, as a sacrifice of sorts, I talked to God about them and while crying I “burned” my sacrifice to God.

Freedom ROCKS is an awesome, awesome concept and I will do my part to promote it!!


[…] new to me. It felt so fresh and invigorating; I felt so alive and freedom just “rocked” so when Lauralee shared her idea to throw a rock into a body of water with a key attached to symbolize “closing a […]


Hi Everyone,

Yes Mimi, finally it is here!!! We can throw our rocks!!! I can’t wait. THank you for the compliment, I’m tiny as a button, haha. I have a virus right now but other than that am great and hope everyone else is too. Don’t forget to let me know what day Mimi, I will be thinking of you and everyone else out there,

Peace, hugs, love and most of all FREEDOM!


Hi Whishpersfrommyheart
Thank you for sharing “freedom ROCKS” on your FB page! I hope it catches on in the survivor community!
Hugs, Darlene


I love the idea – just last night I was reminded in a book I was reading about casting ALL of your cares onto the Lord. We can’t possibly carry all of the crap and buckets of “rocks” and clinging crabs – but HE can. I felt much lighter after praying and releasing – and I will for sure be throwing – casting some rocks that weekend. For me it is like weeding – I try to do it once and for all but daily mainteneance seems to be the way to my restoration. Hugs to you DQ.
Recently in LA they moved a gigantic boulder through the area to the museum – It was a slow steady work – but they did it!!So can we.


Hi Tamara,
I’m happy to hear you’re going to join us for FREEDOM ROCKS!! The more the merrier! I am going to make a list of names I see here and take them with me to my rock throwing ceremony. I will be sending special thoughts over the miles to each person who’s joining in the celebration of FREEDOM! I will be thinking of you!!
Peace and hope,


Hi….I woke up too early this morning from thoughts and memories that were troubling me. I have been in the process of healing for a long time and it is all good, but the process has been long. I realized in the wee hours of the morning here that I need to look at the neglect aspect of what I went through, and somehow in my searchings I landed here at this site! Am glad that I did because I find myself relating to so much….and I have very seldom felt “understood” in the core of my being like this, if that makes sense. Not having a voice, the way I used to feel that I was supposed to care for everyone else’s feelings and what they were experiencing as much more valuable and important than my own needs and wants and experiences etc….my father used to occasionally even call me worthless and a little s@&$. In my world ppl will admit to abuse or neglect, but not ever discuss it like here on this site so this is healing in itself! I made the choice a year ago to cut off all toxic ppl …or anyone that didn’t value me as much as themselves and were always attempting to use me to encourage, listen and build them up and didn’t know how to do the same for me. My life feels MUCH freer and lighter and I feel able to move on and seek more and more healing. So please throw a rock for me! I think it is a great thing to do….and thank you for this site….it is wonderful!


Hi Diane
Welcome to Emerging from Broken! Sounds like you found the right site! We talk about all this kind of stuff here. society seems to have accepted that parents call kids worthless and lots of other names and it doesn’t really matter as though it is just a “normal” thing to do. But it caused a ton of damage to the child and that child grows up with the damage. Here we talk about facing that there IS damage and that it was wrong for parents to do that; it wasn’t “normal” at all.

I hope that you will consider throwing your own rock! There is an “about freedom rocks” page here on the site where I explain how it all works.
Hugs, Darlene


Hi Tamara!
YAY that you are going to be throwing a rock! I love your weeding analogy!
hugs, Darlene


Hi Tamara,

Good for you that you are going to participate in Freedom Rocks. I am happy about that and will be thinking of all the people around the world doing the same!

Peace, hugs, love and Freedom



Thanks Lauralee – great idea ! I will be throwing my rock this weekend too ! I already eliminated all my toxic family members a long time ago. Sorry you never had the relationship with your mom that you always wanted. You were robbed. So was I but I don’t care anymore. Now I am working on getting rid of all the angry people in my life. It feels great and very empowering. I am done with unhealthy angry people. They have been way too hurtful to me for way too long. I realize that they aren’t going to change because they see no need for it so I am getting rid of those type of friends. They dont deserve me or my friendship !


Hi Dave,

I am so overjoyed to hear that you are going to participate in throwing your rock. I am at peace with myself now, I tried, and was turned down twice by my mom, maybe more, who knows, I don’t understand it but the good thing is that I don’t need or have to understand it. And out with the negative angry people too, as soon as you change, it’s funny how some people just can’t stand it. They get all angry, perhaps they need a hug BY AN ANGRY BLACK BEAR haha ok, maybe that was a little overboard. haha
I wish you great peace and happiness and most of all freedom in your life, God bless you Dave!


Oh, and P.S. Darlene deserves all of the credit, if you don’t believe in Angels, you should now, cuz she is one of the purest Angels on this site, helped so many people and continues to do so. God bless her!!


Hi Everyone!
The next post is published in the Freedom ROCKS line up! Mimi shares her motivation behind freedom ROCKS ~ You can read it here ~

My freedom ROCK (I am in the process of writing the post) is going to be totally different ~ mine is going to be all about self care! More soon! Thank you for you lovely compliments about me! My goodness I feel the love!
Hugs, Darlene


I meant to say thanks to you for your lovely compliments about me! (although Dave is big on doing that too and he did it on another post just this morning!)
Thanks to both of you I am feeling MEGA love today!
Hugs, Darlene


Hi Darlene I just posted in P.T.S.D. Article how I’m going to cast a pebble to rock my own freedom.

I read about the event around a week ago but I was massively fatigued and could not come up with a phrase of my own. for one I was silenced.

The tile of one of my Poems is called ”Prisons of the mind”. There are many traumatic memories which are the Prisoners of my mind. soo though Darlene one will be cast in to deep icy water that’s on demon less One possitive thought replacing it. I just happen to have bag full’s of sandstone rock’s ideal to ”write away my pain” On. no need to ask where my thought’s will be banished to. and when the bag is empty as my traumatised mind it will be. ”Oh to have awaken with a glow that did brighten my day. To have reached out to a whole new life and finaly emerged from broken and to be at peace with my Mind. ”Freedon will rock.


Hi Paul!
That is awesome! I am getting emails from all over the world; people are excited about this!

I hope you will come back after you throw your rock or rocks and share with us on one of the freedom Rocks posts (mine will be up before then too, and Mimi’s is up today) your exp. of the actual event!

Hugs, Darlene


Paul, hello,

I am so happy to hear that you will also be doing Freedom Rocks, getting my boulder ready to throw, putting on names and thinking about why I am doing this, very emotional but I cry if I see a dead cat on the side of the road. This will be so great!!! Peace, luv, happiness and most of all Freedom to you!!



Morning Lauralee Darlene I can barely wait to share my experience with you all and to hear of everyone’s.

This particular stone is small and very colourful I have kept it sins 1996 it’s going to be a hugely beneficial throwing away. Just remembered as I type.

Some of you might remember the band called. ”Mott the Hoople”. with a Hit called ”wont you roll away the stone”. It always had meaning in my life for some reason Not perhap’s I know why.

I’m going to take some photos of said stone and hopefully as I cast it away forever out of my mind. have a nice day all.


Laurallee Hi you jogged another Memory You mentioned ”Boulder”. Well Three years ago I was in Manchester to take part in a Boulder Event”. Holding up a large Boulder Portraying the boulder as being a huge burden on my shoulders of ”STIGMA”. How fitting again.

The Mental Health Charity ”Rethink” Based in London organised the event which was held in other areas perhaps yu can check Rethink out to access some of the photos. I have some amazing photos on my computer but they are copyrighted to Rethink. Perhaps They might give permission foryou to have a copy. this little pebble I have has been a huge burden for me.


Morning everyone,

Working on my rock today, yay!!!! Paul I will check out Rethink and I’d love to see yours, mine is on my facebook, I look like a mass murderer for some reason, haha so serious which I am not at all.
I look forward to the day!!! Tell me all about it!!!!
P.S. It’s funny how many meanings that one boulder can have for us all… Peace, love, happiness and Freedom



Yay go rock for it Lauralee for a better future I held my Boulder up high now I’m about to cast another in the the shadow of History. Have fixed my camera so not to miss recording it. but then should we all delete the evidence after sharing one mass delete live on line.

Peace love and much feeedom to you.


Hi Paul,

Ha, you’re right, I’m recording it too, I know there will be alot of emotions, maybe some bad words, but it’s all coming out. My rock is heavy actually, I’m only 102LBS and the rock I picked needed to be sinkable and have lots of room for names, sooooooo, needless to say it better not bounce off another rock and crack in two.
I wish the media would have gotten involved, gonna try and contact them one more time, they write about cats in trees but they should be reporting stories like this, gonna try and get a pic of my rock on here, it’s on my facebook page anyways if anyone wants to see it, I look like a mass murderer in the pick carrying the rock, I’ve never seen myself so serious!
Freedom is coming, can’t wait!!

Peace, happiness, hugs, love and FREEDOM


Darlene: How would I get my rock pic up???


I really like the metaphor about the crabs and the bucket!
I feel as though I have been outside that bucket carrying it around offering the crabs freedom only to have them rebuke. Now it’s time to set the bucket down and walk away!

I also liked Tamara’s metaphor, “it is like weeding – I try to do it once and for all but daily mainteneance seems to be the way to my restoration.”
I feel as though the weeds in my life are the broken tapes in my head(negatives, dysfunctional thinking) that I have to keep weeding out to let the flowers grow(positives, functional thinking).

So my rocks will represent:
Walking away from the crab bucket.
Throwing away the weeds.
Enough is Enough!



Got your message, not sure why both our blogs our not united. Mother’s day at noon will be fine for me too. I can’t wait and I promise to send you pictures. I will be thinking of you, Darlene, and everyone out there who will be casting their rocks into the water.

Love, Peace, happiness, hugs and FREEDOM to all!



Dear Changesandnewbeginnings:

I am estatic that you will be joining us in Freedom Rocks, the world is going to wonder what all these people are doing?? haha It’s going to be emotional, I know that for sure, just not sure which way the emotions will run, but I will let whatever I feel be, be as it is supposed to be. Don’t walk away from the bucket my dear, run, run as fast as you can.

Peace, hugs, love, happiness and Feedom (and as your name says, may this bring you new positive changes and beginnings)



Hi Lauralee,

I love your pic., reminds me of being in a peaceful, meditative, state, throwing hands up in air, and very happily saying “WHATEVER!”

As far as the running I feel like someone making a prison break and trying to run with the shackles on! Another thought is Forest Gump!
Taking a stance reminds me of being a rebellious runaway just to get returned home, bracing myself between the wall and bedroom door so no one could get in and cranking Twisted Sister “We’re Not Gonna Take, NO, We’re Not Gonna Take it Anymore!”

I am looking forward to the rock throwing that it may release some of these old feelings! I am aware that I’m not the child running away more but an adult taking the necessary steps to healing!

Lots of Hugs & Blessings to all in this process of gaining “FREEDOM”

P.S. Another song was “Hold on for one more day” by Wilson Philips.


Hi Changesandnewbeginnings,

I was in a meditative state, I had just finished, and my daughter took the camera and snap. And now I say to myself “whatever” because I’m not going to take it anymore. I remember all those songs, used to sing them with my broomstick, especially Wilson Phillips, oh my, haha I used to belt that one out. Somehow it worked out for me, because I did hang on one more day, and one more and then out of the bucket I came and never looked back until I was called for my brother’s death. I told them not to call me when the next person dies, not being cruel, I was only called to be put back into mother role after 10 years of complete distance to pay for a funeral because my brother had no insurance and my family have nothing which is of their own doing. I worked sinc I was 17 for the Gov’t and worked my way up the whole time without a diploma as I had to work to help the family survive. I am proud of the road I chose, sure it was less travelled and more difficult but I thank God for each and every experience good and bad. It made me who I am today! Now I have to you tube that song, can’t get it out of my head, oh no…….

Many hugs, luv, peace, happiness and Freedom to you,


P.S. I think you’re gonna be alright my friend, I’m glad you found this site!!!


Thank you Lauralee, it’s grrrreat (lol, Tony the tiger) to be here!

TTFN (:Tigger:)


Good Morning allYes ‘GOOD MORNING”. How cant it be with so much possitivity. I can sum it all upwith a phrase I wrote a while back two actually.

”In Adversity, One’s inner strenghth shine’s through”. the other being.

”They will hurt me no more”.

And the heavier your rock the more pain your mind will cast away in to the depth’s.

If teardrop’s fall,let them flow, May they wash away your sorrow, and give you peace to carry on”. In to a whole new life with meaning and purpous and ”FREEDOM”.


Good morning to you to Paul and everyone on site,

The positive is coming, I can’t wait, nervous at the same time, so weird. I am very happy that so many of you will be throwing Freedom rocks! Together we stand, and I think it’s great that everyone is doing this, we each have our own reasons but we are doing it.

Back to the rock, so many names………….

Peace, love, hugs, happiness and Freedom forever,


Yet again A good morning to you Lauralee and everyone. That sont ”Breaking up is hard to do’. it reminds me so painfully that breaking away from the painful and hurtful memories is so hard to do. something I have never been able to do I never had a strategy to cast my pain away. I’m so very afraid this every secod of my life sinse my first trauma as a three year old. I never had a chance to comprehend what and why such shocking things weredone to me they were sonumerous and so shocking. I tell of how there are many Paul’s each time I endured a trauma a new Paul cried out Someone help Please help”. I still cry out that is the adult Paul who saw every little Paul suffer in ”SILENCE”. Not anymore I have a responsibility to put so much pain in a place it cant hurt little Paul’s.”In the deep blue cold sea” where my pain will be washed gently soothingly ”away”. My Mind a Prison No more. May Freedom Rock you all.


Hi Paul,

I went to your site and I wanted to say thank you for your shares and the capabilities of putting it out there! I’m at the beginning stages of putting it out there in writing. Trying to articulate can be frustrating when the mind wants to flow faster than the fingers, lol!
I also like your comment about the heavier rock, makes sense!


Helo Changesandnewbeginnings what a wonderful name you have you are just the name I so need.

Yes trying to articulate is so frustrating but with a mind in overdrive 24/7 it’s sure warp speed faster than my fingers O.C.D. If you know whatI mean.

I talked about how ”Writing away the pain”. Saved my life and opened up a whole new meaningful life. which has also led me here. to meet so many very brave caring and understanding people. Thank you for finding the time to visit my website many say they can relate. just as we all do here.

Darlene has so wonderfully made that huge difference. I cant’ find words to describe my gratitude and admiration. but it’s all of ”YOU” And ”ME” That she has brought together all in one place that makes her so very special. ”YOU ALL ROCK”. Paul.


Hi Paul
Thanks for your lovely comments about me; I really appreciate your comments and yes, we are all in this together!
We all rock!
Hugs, Darlene


Hey Paul,

I once did a thing called the journey, where your “little” self talks to all the people who hurt you, it helped in a way, but I am extremely visual and I really need to see that rock/mini boulder sink in the water. I want to feel the pull of all the pain that some people still have over me go down with them. I invision it all day, down they go never to be able to come back again. If I see them I will know they can’t hurt me, I’ve thrown away their power over me. Young kids should not have to go through bad things, horrible things, parents have a job to do, all over facebook is “stop the abuse” well lets also help them heal when we do stop the abuse from taking place. At least we have this site, sometimes I wonder why I see a pschycologist, lol

Peace, love, hugs, happiness and Freedom to all.



P,S, Paul what is the full name of your site if you don’t mind, tried to reach it but couldn’t……. :o(

Thanks, Lauralee


Hi Lauralee if you click on Paul’s name it takes you straight there!


Thanks, appreciate that,

hugs to you too, Lauralee


Hello Darlene Regard’s we are all in it together” Please never say it to a sertain Prime Minister”’.

Lauralee Hi again I have been posting in a Facebook page someone wanted info about helpful resources in aid of ”Suicide Prevention”. yes a very painful issue. and Oh so close to my heart.

I pointed out that there are many inspirational people including ”You Darlene”. who bring people together who give instant mutual support to each other. and Ifeel the need for such amazing peple and theirhealing websites to all be in one place and displayed worldwide ”EVERYWHERE”.

Lauralee, what you just said I so relate to. I actually talk to all the little Paul’s even the older one’s. I also give grand speeches to non exhistent people like I’m a Lawyer in a court room summing up the evidence. explaining what happened. but it’s also meant for those who hurt me so much. ”Paul seeking justice”. My thought’s are so overwhelming they are my whole life, even in my sleep. My mind is extremely visual as I immagine all manor of horrors in gory colour to do as you say would be so healing. and now it’s Rocking possible. You have mentioned something so very important. yes talk about stopping abuse”. but what then do we leave victim’s all alone to endure decades of shocking emotional pain? NO I say we need support and understanding. reconition that we have endured so much. I cry out I say again ”Someone help, Please ”HELP”. For sure Darlene Has helped enormously as have othwrs. and when they bring people together WOW. What amazing thing’s can happen.

O.K. My site I wont post it without permission but yes just click on my name. Bear in mind, I was denied any education due to shocking abuses in all my school years and later in life. ”No Educational qualification’s whatever” Just my life experiences to share”’.

The design and running of thesite was done by a volunteer a mosy astounding human being I must point out. How lucky I,to have been so fortunate for such a person to help me in setting up my website. Yes I talk of some of my horrific experiences but I also show the possitive Paul’Paul the ”Survivor”. against incredible add’s in my own personal adversity. it has taken so many people for me to have survived. but it’s my own inner strenght that truelly made survival possible. But when others help you it makes your life worth living not just surviving. andfor sure I’m going to Rock this weekend. Thinking of you all. Paul.


Dave, Paul, Lauralee, Darlene, changesandnewbeginnings, and everyone else,
I have totally missed all this discussion. I thought EFB seemed awfully quiet lately. I haven’t been getting the email updates for some reason. I am thrilled to see all the excitement and participation from everyone here. (Lauralee, I smiled at the big black bear hug, haha)!

I haven’t found my rock yet. Been busier than usual lately. I will though!!!! Like Lauralee, mine might be a boulder. And, the lake might be void of water when I’m done! 🙂
Love and Hope,


Ooh yes I’ll be doing this, it has come at a great time for me as I’ve had a breakthrough today, I really think I have turned a corner and things will never be the same again (in a good way.) All I have to do now is try to decided what to write on the rock as I feel spoiled for choice; maybe I should have more than one rock?
I feel Darlene is Heaven-sent and a terrific guide xxx


Yes I’ll be doing this, it has come at a great time for me as I’ve had a breakthrough today, I really think I have turned a corner and things will never be the same again (in a good way.) All I have to do now is try to decided what to write on the rock as I feel spoiled for choice; maybe I should have more than one rock?
I feel Darlene is Heaven-sent and a terrific guide xxx


Sorry for duplicate post, had trouble with the submit.


Mimi: You make me laugh out loud so often, I’m sure there will be some water left, haha I may create a Tsunami my daughter said. I found mine, you can see pics on my facebook under my name or I can email you. It’s pretty heavy, I wish my mom was there to say “I told you we don’t thow rocks” haha
Paul: Very touching and very proud that you also call yourself a survivor and not Paul the victim. I hate it when people call me that, I consider myself a survivor in every sense of the way. Education, ha, I made it up to a manager’s position in the Gov’t with no education because I too had to go out and work at an early age just to survive. But it was with great persistance that I got where I am today. Good for you for all you have done, you should be very proud of who you are.
Hi Sam:
Welcome!!! I found my rock and am running out of room, haha I too feel the need for another one. I don’t want to be greedy but if I’m gonna get it out I might as well go big or go home. Everything that comes to mind goes on the Rock. My first rock word was “MOM”. At first I was wondering if I should call her by name, then I said does it really matter??? Only I know what the names mean. So, I’m half way there, then I want to seal my rock with a sealer. I am delighted that you are joining us, yes Darlene is a Godsend, she has saved me with her words of wisdom on more than one occasion, even moreso than she probably knows.
Peace, happiness, love, hugs and Freedom!!



Hi Lauralee Mimi made a big splash on me also I smiled.

As for being a Survivor I can actually be very proud of this monumental achievment. Only I know the magnitude of what I have survived. On one occasion I was on my knees looking up to my left everywhere around was brilient white flash ”I was dead” yet I demanded of a Higher being’ No my children”. meaning God cant take me from this earth as I needed to be there for my children”. God duelly obliged and granted me life yet again. as hehas sinse then many more time’s. I have Odes OF Survival. Survival being the Human instinct to survive far beyond Human comprehension. well my comprehension at least. Odes, being I’m around to boulder’ly write the tale. ”Gloria Gaynor” I will survive”. And YOU, YOU, YOU YOU, YOU, YOU,


I’m going to your facebook page to look at your boulder!! 🙂


Ok Mimi, I look like I’m ready to kill someone with my rock, my kids think I look possessed. haha funny thing is I am the most none serious person out there. If you want to join my facebook no problem, if not I respect your privacy 100%. Can’t wait to see your rock too Mimi, or should I say boulder??? LOL

Paul: I think I’m a cat. I should have died many times and did once, but something pulled at me from behind ripping me back into my body. The doctor’s can’t believe how I can still be walking around. Guess someone upstairs has better plans for me. It’s like he was saying “oh no, you’re not taking the easy way out, you’re going all the way and you’re gonna make it”. And I did, here I am!!!

Peace, hugs, love, happiness and Freedom

P.S. Mimi, let me know if you have any trouble, oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, my oldest daughter is getting married, and I picked her dress out for her, wasn’t gonna repeat the same crap as my mom, I went and picked my dress out alone. So I bought it for her and kept my composure but cried like a baby when we left the store, haha I’m so weepy!! I cry over dead cats on the side of the road!!!


I went to your page. I don’t think it was you though. It was private settings but it looked like only 6 friends??? For whatever reason, I picture you with 1,006, not 6. 🙂


PFT, I thought everyone cried over cats laying in the road. I am an animal LOVER!! 🙂


Haha Mimi you’re funny, I particular about who I let in my circle, I only have around 80 people on there, haha it’s under Lauralee Hunter Rivet there is a picture of me and my daughter at the spa in the pool. Let me know if you find it ok? Anyone else who wants to see it go ahead, no problem.

Hugs to you my friend, xo Lauralee


Hey everyone,

It’s funny how when the truth gets out the abuser feels backed into a corner. I was told by my aunt that all of this is old and happened so many years ago and things that happened that long ago should not be brought up. My perfect answer and so very proud of myself:::::

THEN WHY ARE THEY MAKING ANOTHER TITANIC MOVIE IF IT HAPPENED SO LONG AGO???? then Click!! ha, gotcha there didn’t I?? Felt so good and liberating, how dare she!!!


Good answer!!! I’ll have to remember that one!!
I have tried to search you several times on FB now. I only get one person to come up in the search and it’s always the same one, no profile pic, and 6 friends. I sent a message to that person hoping it was you. Did you get a message from me on FB?


Hey Mimi,

You poor thing, it’s not me, try Lauralee Hunter-Rivet and I’ll pop up with my daughter. LOL I hope you get me…..

Lauralee xo


OMG, lol! Someone just got a message from me. The OTHER Lauralee Hunter Rivet. And, I must tell you, every EVERY time I type your name, I accidentally type in Hunger!! Are you hungry by any chance? It’s just too weird!! Haha! Okay, going there now…. hope to see you there!!


Lauralee….. I just can’t find you. I did type in Hunger again just now. Just keeping up with tradition. Sheesh, I’m getting discouraged that I may never find you!! Even with the dash, and Hunter spelled correctly, there’s still only one…. the one who thinks I want to be her friend… whose circle is even smaller than yours. 6 is a small circle!! 🙂 Do you have email now? Last email I read said you wouldn’t be accessing that account anymore. WHAT is going on with FB that they don’t want me to see you!!!!???? UGH!!


Hahah Mimi,

You are a mind reader, I have gone through 4 bags of sweet and salty popcorn in two days, my husband is embarrassed buying it all the time, LOL
Try emailing me at and we will eventually hook up!! I promise!!

Lauralee xoxo

P.S. Not sure who the other person is, but it sure isn’t me….


for kicks-n-giggles and freedom rock I tried…
Mimi I’m with ya I can’t get Lauralee to come up on fb either, I kept getting the one with 6 friends as well.
Hugs 🙂


That is so weird, being rejected from FB, email me instead…

LOL Lauralee


Hi Everyone
I published my mothers day post! I did it early because of the freedom ROCKS event this weekend!
This post is about how my relationship with my daughter made me sink into a deeper understanding of my non relationship with my mother…
You can read it here:
Hugs, Darlene


Hello Lauralee So You think your a Cat That’s ”Cool for Cat’s. Boom Town Rat’s? cat’s and Rat’s.

Lauralee even as a 17 year old I thought I had outlived the luck of every cat that ever lived. And I’m so here also to tell the cat of many a nine tail’s. Yes I can have a funny sense of Humour about serious trauma.

When I demanded of a Higher Being”. it was the most profound one off experience of a life time. As to me I really was dead and sure should have been. So I also must be here for a reason and a Possitive one at that, if no quite yet my mind is working on it. ”Eventually ”I will arrive with a Prescence of Mind”.

Peace, Love Happyness, ”FREEDOM”.


Good morning or afternoon all!!

Almost done my rock, I’m full of black sharpie marker, LOL and I am starting to get this nervous exciting feling in me. I can’t wait. I’m going to video tape it, I want to remember this day for forever.

MiMI: Have you found me on FB yet?

Well, back to my rock, peace, love, hugs, happiness and Freedom to all of you!!!


Hi Lauralee/Everyone.

A friend who has been watching over me has just came to insist he takes me to the coast I’m about to prepare my ROCK’S

I’m so very exhited. and want to share my experience with the world.

Darlene it might be wise to prepare a big page for a flood of Photo Rock’s. P.S. If anyone can get media attention and show them our photos etc that would be amazing so many could turn to you Darlene for support. and come next year wow how many more will take part.

Peace, Love, hugs, happyness, ”FREEDOM”.


Hi All
My freedom ROCKS post has just been published!
You can read it here ~ My post has a focus on a new level of self care and self love. I am going to be throwing a freedom rock letting go of “putting the needs of others before my own”.
Hope to hear from you there!
Hugs, Darlene


Hi Darline It’s turned 1a’m and I’m still working on my Rock’s

Interestingly. A friend came earlier and told me Those who help others the most, Need the most help”.

He done his homework all right I sure need help,He was rightly suggesting I need to put myself first, then others. He know’s many have let me down. so is cautious of me helping others when I dont get help myself.

But as yet Darlene he does not know you and everyone here and of all those we collectively can help and support even though we need to take good care of ourself. I think it’s about getting the ballance right.

I have wire brushed my rocks, and I can barely wait untill 10 a’m when I set off for the Beech.

I had a thought as I was brushing my rocks. What if some of us cant make it to water due to health and location issues, could they ask someone to do it for them a volunteer to take a rock in their Honour. Right back to my Freedom Rocks.



Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish all of you FREEDOM, peace, love and happiness this coming weekend. I will be throwing or tryng to at least throw my rock on Mother’s Day like Mimi at noon. This is a big step for all of us and I do hope that you feel very liberated when you are done. I will be stopping for a moment of silence to think of all of you who will be or already have thrown their rock and sending good wishes and positive thoughts your way.

Paul: I think that is a very good point that you brought up, and yes I think that it would be wonderful to help someone out and throw their rock for them if they are willing to let you. I don’t want to start anything here, (next thing you know I will need a wheel barrow for all the requests) but it is a good idea, you are a kind warm soul Paul, and true, sometimes the ones who help the most need help themselves, but we all have each other here, and the support is amazing.

Peace, hugs, love, happiness and most of all ROCK YOUR FREEDOM EVERYONE!!!!!!!

Lauralee xo


Lauralee…. my soul sister!! I am looking forward to this so much. I’m kind of stoked that it’s on Mother’s day. It’s a good day for it.

I too will be thinking of you and all the other people here… the hurting souls, the volumes of hurting souls.

I wish you abundant peace Lauralee, and everyone else too. I’ll also take some time to think and pray ~ for myself and everyone else.

Love and FREEDOM to everyone this weekend!!


Almost forgot ~ I really hope everyone comes back to share their experience. I understand if you can’t, but, I hope you all do.
Love and hugs,


Hi Lauralee. it’s 2.30am I’m getting a lift at 10am to the deep blue North Sea. Where upon I will arive with sack full of ”abusers”

But once I cast them in to the cold depth’s I will turn around and arrive home with a Prescence of Mind.

I was rather handy with a wheel barrow as with a pick and shovel. as I tried to dig away the pain Racing my mind trying to escape it’s desperate thought’s. But now I a’m truelly of a different Mind.

I a’m now ”Empowered with FREEDOM ROCKS”.

a’m proud to know myself proud of who I have become, proud to say I will now come first proud to say dady’s cry out loud for the love of their children for the love of their fellow Human Being proud to say ”I care” for you all here proud to say ”I WILL CHALLENGE ABUSERS” They will hurt ”ME” No more”. nor you or you or you or you or you. as together we are FREEDOM ROCKER’S. AND WE WILL THIS COMMING WEEKEND ROCK THE WORLD. ”Peace” to all.


Hello again all,

Mimi, you are too funny, if you go to Darlene’s FB page you’ll find me, that’s how someone else did it, I hope you’re not lost in FB space looking for me right now….LOL

Hi Paul,

It’s only 10:30 here, Ottawa time, so I have a ways yet to go. I am so happy to read that you are in a place and taking back your power. It’s not an easy thing to do, I just did it with my son not too long ago, his father and my family turned him against me, and at my brother’s funeral he passed right by me at the door and said nothing. So, me being the feisty little firecracker that I am walked right in there and said “here, here’s a pin for you, and by the way, I’m proud of you (he just became a firefighter) and I love you.” And that was it, he is still on the family’s side. But I took my power back from him that day and on Sunday Ottawa better watch out cuz there just might be a Tsunami when I throw my boulder!! Can’t wait to hear how it went for you, I’ll be thinking of you along with all the others.

Peace, hugs, love, happiness and Freedom

Lauralee xo


Hi Lauralee 3.40am now 7 hours time the rocks will be cast over the cliff along with the demons trapped within it’s sandstone prison.

No more the Prisons of my own mind.

You are such a very brave firecracker Lauralee if only someone like you had of been my protector then again I survived all the odd’s by by self.

A day before my sons funeral I was told I had to buy my own flowers after wehad the traditional parents flower arangement sorted. no one at the funeral spoke to me I had to walk there no family hearse for me so the funeral director after the sermon put me in my sons herse next to the driver for the short ride to his resting place but this was my gain as itwas I who escorted my son to his meeting with God. and not she a vile abuser after my son was laid to rest the funeral director and Priest discussed how they would get me home the priest took me just dropped me off and said good by. an hour later I was in a job Centre my second home I was in deep deep trauma but looking for work to feed the abusers children I did not even live with. things happened that would shock you all here things that rarely happen a one off of the most hideous calousness One day it must be made public in the public interest. My Freedon Rocks are to me of the most profound importance and will mark the beginning of freedom from many an abuser but many of them will never be free from my quest for ”JUSTICE”.

I a’m getting photos taken so will need guidance how to post them and how many I’m allowed to. might it help if we could all just send them to an E/Mail address for them to all be sorted first. My writings are very much my poetry focussed I’m going to place my rocks here by the computer before I go and take a few snap’s

Peace and love to you all.


Great idea about sending the rock photos to an e-mail address to be sorted! I went to your blog the other day and was deeply moved by your traumas & what you have survived. I cringed & was appalled at what the supervisor referred to you as…I don’t want to say it here, since I don’t know how you would feel about that. It’s so cruel what people say sometimes. Words do Hurt!…My mom used to say, “Sticks & Stones may break your bones but Words will never hurt you!” What a crock!…Maybe she was teaching me to let it bounce off, but that’s not validating my feelings. It is a funny saying but as a child who understands that??

Peace to You & everyone here!


I’m looking forward to Freedom Rocks!…I’ll be thinking of you & others here too. It is empowering to do this together!
Peace & Positive Vibes to all!


I’m in wow with everything! My Heart is with everyone on this huge journey and the representation of “Freedom Rock!” How meaningful and immense!
All my relatives are up for Mothers day family reunion(a 3 day wk-end)… This Is my first year not attending…
As time closes in every feeling, emotion, etc., is stirring like crazy! I have a lot Freedom Rocks to throw… should of made this a camping trip!!!

Hugs to all


Hi Sonia I thought I was wow’d up enough but you all keep turning up my gears. So I might as revit up all the to ”FREEDOM” LAND OF PEACE POSSITIVE VIBES LOVE AND Happy day’ness. Yes I’m delerious. a mirage is comming on Paul on a liff top Rollong aay the stones”. I hope I dont make a cliff hanger of it.

SMD. Hello a priveledge to meet you.

Thank you for you kind comment’s, I learned the meaning from a councellor each individual’s trauma is more traumatic than anyone elses as only we live and endure it. and we cont do the same ith others.

I do know though I have starred sertain death in the face many many many times over and all the serious injuries and the almost injuries I have lost a baby son possibly to as no one is admiting to the second child’s father, abortion’s and Misscarrages included. all monor of shocking abuses gripe gripe gripe. but I’m in the right place to talk about it and to listen to others very sensitively and caringly.

I’m very open about my Issues being a commited Media Campaigner so feel free to comment without the slightest possibility of upsetting me. it’s only talking openly can aarness be raised. and yes not all can be so open. but I sure a’m open. They ont hurt me no more.

sending by mail would be amazingly easy for me but hey who would be at the other end bombarded with thousands of photos? got my rocks bagged and a few more treat’s. Today I think I will turn in to a Happy Survivor, as I watch the demons sink in to the sea.

Now let’s get rocking all over world. and what a Status Quo to go.


Hi All I’m off any moment to create a tidal wave In the North Sea but it wont make my Boulders float. they are for the bottom Forever”.

Thank you all for such incredible inspiration. I feel great already.

Chat soon.


Well then People around the world Paul has just got back from the deep blue cold North Sea. and you would never guess what Happened as I turned to come home. well I did have a massive hip of a Boulder on my left shoulder I got the Boulder as I was alway’s last for the Goodie’s. well not any more I will be first in the line for everything because I’m worth it. I’m special I’m Unique I’m so happy I’m a ”FREEDOM ROCK” I’m standing tall never to bow and cower when faced with Adversity. I will also be your rock and you can be mine in eternal ”FREEDOM”. Anyone fancy starting a Rockers Club?


You are the first person to share your story of throwing your rock. Yay for you and for being the first in line too.
That is awesome!
Hugs, Darlene


Hello All!!!!

Wow Paul, you did it, I am so very proud of you, that’s a big step, and you are right, I want my rock to stay at the bottom for forever with all the people and things that are on it. I’m doing it tomorrow, I got goose bumps just reading your post. So many have similiar stories, I’ve seriously been to hell and back with my so called family, something no child should endure, but I am sure as hell not going to give them my power and sit here and say poor me, why me. Instead I say, why not me? I’ll take on this challenge if I have to head on. Difficult to say and do, yes, very much, but I am persistant and when I put my mind to somehthing I do it. When I see the word immpossible or hear it I laugh, cuz immpossible is really I’m possible!! I hope your feeling of liberation last for forever Paul, congrats! I’m not a rocker but after tomorrow I just might be, haha sure we could start a group!

I’ll be thinking of you too, I wish luck and I hope you come away from it feeling liberated and free and at peace my friend.

Good luck to you as well,I will let everyone know about my experience once it has come and gone, until then,
Peace, love, hugs, happiness and most of all FREEDOM in your minds and lives,

Lauralee xoxo


Lauralee and all
Please consider sharing your rock stories on Mimis and Lauralees posts, (or where every your converstaions began, AND on my freedom rock post for maximum exposure!
Hugs, Darlene
Here is the link;


Lauralee and Paul…
I think we already STARTED a group!!!
hugs, Darlene


Congratulations from my heart!! What a day to celebrate!!

I am beginning to write on my rock today. I have some ribbons to tie on it, each one a color that represents something. I won’t go into the full details, I want to share it ALL after my event tomorrow.



Hi all,

Mimi did you find me on FB yet? LOL I can’t wait to see your rock, mine is so boring, just a black sharpie pen. Maybe I’ll stick some googly eyes on it, just so that I know in my mind that someone has their eye on my rock and are making sure it stays where it stays!!! LOL

Peace, love, hugs, happiness and freedom always to all of you,



Hi Darlene Lauralee Mimi We sure you sure have started a Group. and I’m sure Rocking.

Just had 12 hours crashed out as had 24 hours preparing for my big day. I need to rest before I share my story properly

I had six rocks any my they were heavy but not anymore I feel wonderful.

Wishing you all a wonderful personal Freedom Rock day. as I prpare the story of my life.

Peace, Love, hugs, happyness and freedom always and ever to all of you.


I’m back Darlene HUGS You dod mention putting ourself first I explained this to my friend who took me I said I always put myself last, but not anymore. as I will be ”FIRST”. Well someone had to be.

Lauralee Not only did I take my power back my mind back my life back ”I took away their power” They will hurt me no more”. I already knew the meaning of it but now I feel it within my heart.

Darlene is so important I dont share my full story untill I’m a little rested as I make to many typoos It’s the most important story I will ever tell.

”A most wonderfully special story. have a very special weekend everyone.

Back very soon.


Hi Everyone
I have decided to throw my freedom rock at 2:00 Estern Standard Time tomorrow (Sunday) if anyone wants to throw at the same time, knowing that at least one other person is doing it then. If you want to know what time that is where you live, just check the world time clock here:
Hugs, Darlene


Hi Darlene it’s 3.30 a.m. I’m preparing myself to write on your blog will take few hours though and I will se how my photos look first.

Regardsthe time clock I have tried this before and it’s totally confusing for this individual. I have use video conferencing with people in America. and the only way I can o this is for some kind people in America I know on facebook to give a real time check where they are in their own timezone and relate it to my own. to do it at exact time to the second minuit would need a whole lot of time check’s due to so many localised time zones. I done my own now but so hoped others were at same time. may be we could all do it again at same time with new people for the first time to give solidarity Darlene just started crying as I’m about to say I now have ”FREEDOM”. And 54 years in the making.

To all those out there on their own journey of seld discovery Please hurry up your time and life on this planet is so very special. and it’s your lifeto live not anyone who has abused you in any way. ”FREEDON ROCKS.

With Care



Hello Everyone,

Well, I did it!!! As my husband and I were driving to the roaring rapids I passed by my sister along the way, ha, now what are the chances of that?
I found my spot and meditated awhile and thought and said a little prayer for everyone else out there casting their stones and then I threw mine!! It bounced of one rock and then into the roaring rapids. I felt so liberated and strong, with the sound of the rushing water, I imagined the rapids taking my rock and saying “everything is going to be fine, these “problems” are in my hands now. I am very proud of myself. Noone can hurt me anymore, I feel so free. I decided not to have my daughter’s atttend as I was not sure of my reaction. I felt very cleansed afterward, like all the toxic negative energy just went away. Freedom does rock, I have my video and will try and upload it on my Facebook page, my husband didn’t think my skinny little arms would be able to throw that rock but then again, I never knew I could be the little crab that could!
Peace, love, hugs, happiness, liberation and Freedom to all of you,
Lauralee xoxo
P.S. Mimi, I thought about you at noon, I’m glad your experience was a good one, well deserved my friend!!


CONGRATS to you!! The day finally came. I totally thought about you too. I prayed for you, myself, and all the many hurting people.

I am about to go to my page and write down my experience. BTW, I went and looked for you on the EFB page on facebook. I didn’t see any comments but I’m going to go back there and look again soon. Hope to find you there!!
Peace and much love to you Lauralee!!


Hi all
Lauralee, will you copy and paste your freedom rocks story into my blog post on freedom rocks too? Thanks!!

Everyone ~ I posted a video on you tube of the rock throwing!
you can watch it here. (the audio gets better as the wind dies down)

Hugs, Darlene


Hi Darlene & Lauralee,

I enjoyed both your videos and I thank you both for sharing!

Hi Paul,
Did you end up posting any photos you mentioned? I didn’t do any pics or video I went solo.


P.S. got quiet here, thought notifications wasn’t working!


A big Hello Changesandnewbeginnings You name is everything that is happening to me now Freedom Rocks”. I have had to sort some ongoing issues out and with great support. I’m stronger by the day we need faith in ourself and all our inner hopes for a better life can be realised one possitive stride forward to know youand others here who care and understand even tho the pain so great surely can only help us all in so many ways. I have been quiet here giving my time to fully reflect on my most possitive experience throwing my six rocks. I have lot’s of photos just waiting to share but not without express permission from Darleneand wherever appropriate so many though she has to chat with it might take some time but I can barely wait to share with you all and see others do the same I hope. as I always write Caring is sharing, sharing is caring. my own quote. some of us wont be able to be soopen but I’m used to being public we are all diverse and unique the way we do things Darlene has got us all together here in such a special way just writing to you now is so theraputic and knowing it’s shared with everyone here is so healing. hope to sharemore very soon. Paul.


Hi Paul, Lauralee, Mimi, Darlene, all,
I just set up a new profile on Facebook called Anns Place as part of exploring the part of me that is trying to “Emerge from Broken to Wholeness” just like Darlene’s title says! It seems most fitting for a fresh start in making more changes and new beginnings… I want to get beyond this “surviving” and know “thriving, freedom & wholeness!”

I have been struggling with the fact that I have all these relatives & other people associated with my family as friends on my facebook profile page. Since mother’s day I just want to unfriend them all even if they haven’t said anything or just because they haven’t! The rest are zygna gaming friends and I don’t want to all of a suddenly share this aspect of my life on them.

My other thoughts where of my first real step onto this journey back in 1995 when I went inpatient at a MICA unit. Before my release we had discussed necessary steps to becoming healthier. These steps where to get involved with people who were working towards similar/common goals and to relocate if possible.

So here I am getting involved with others who are working towards similar/common goals and relocating to a new “Anns Place” and possibly making some new friends along the way!

Hope this makes sense.
Hugs, Ann


Morning ‘Anns Place”. It all make’s very possitive sense. As I keep saying over the years Mutual care support understanding. ”The Mutual lived Experience’s.

The Mutual support from everyone here has deeply moved me. Mimi Lauralee as well as Darlene and your good self are four amazing examples of such amazing support to each other. It’s already made an amazing difference to my life and I know people that have came to visit who also have issues in their life and say they need to visit more often as one person said just yesturday.

Hoping to meet you at ”Annd Place” very soon.



Thank you Paul, Hugs, Ann


Hello Ann. Your most welcome.

This toyou Ann and everyone here. My new found freedom from past horror’s has so trnsformed me this past 10 day’s. with support I have had food every day. an astounding achievement. I have ate out got out the houise all be it with support. Mt Freedom really is Rocking. Thank’s to every single amazing person here.

I’m so incredibly grateful. but very mindful we all have issues so just let me add I care about each and every one of you. you are all so very special and brave. Thank you one and all.



I’m celebrating your newfound freedom with you. I feel your grateful heart. Congrats on taking back your life and freedom. I wish you the very very best.


Hello Mimi as always you are so kind and thoughtful. Thank You.

Thank you for the ”Freedom Rocks. All six of them. I prepared the previous 24 hours. I in the middle of the night after scrubbing them clean and flat dried them out on my radiators then layed them out on the kitchen floor. Then came the very special bit of Freedom rocks I sat in my loung thinking what I would write on them remember each one was of the most traumatic of past experiences. going back 51 years pain inflicted by others.

As I sat and pondered hat to write I went over all my traumas in the deepest and calmest thought ”I had a comming together with my heart mind and souL” Mimi I just started crying what I’m trying to express is so very very special and wonderful and life changing. I came to terms with my pain each then all the little Paul’s wanted to tell me what to say one paul at a time as I calmly walked in to the kitchen and delicately wrote down the words that would inprison my Demons so real in to sandstone. forever trapped in their own demons so real.

My preparation was regimental and detailed nothing left to chance.

Then Mimi I brought them all to my computer desk and layed them out all around even on the floor with a board full of meaningful poems I wrote. which I took with me to the Cliff edge. I took photos of the website with the poems and rocks all around it even myself. to show my preparation recorded forever. the possitive and strong adult Paul.

The answers were already written down in my poems Mimi and their titles. I had already trpped the demons so real they just needed to be cast away ”FREEDOM ROCKS”. Cast my demons away forever in the ”Deep cold blue North Sea”. Where ”They will hurt me no more”.

It was the process Mimi and how I engaged with my own mind in meaningful thought.

An amazing friend took me to the Beach at 10am arrived around 10.15am with a Haldall so very heavy on my burdened shoulder even this was planned to represent on big heavy Boulder. as soon as we arrived I got out with my board with six poems six rocks. and My Camera. I charged up a steep hill like I was Superman never pausing for thaught so strong and focussed no looking back for support I went straight by the edge dangerous yes planned again to represent my confidence in myself. set up my board layed the poems out ”SNAP” Snap snap. self portrait included.As I looked down to choose my spot of Freedam so very sadly I noticed a bunch of flowers perched on a ledge. this so sad sight reminded me of how I came so close so many times and that atthat moment I realised that I had grasped ”Freedom” from my Multiple abusers Now it wa pay back time As I cast them in to the ”Deep cold Blue North Sea” forever entomed in their own Demons so real.

They will hurt me no more.

Mimi Darlene ”Ann”. Lauralee. you all have been so amazingly kind and supportive as others here have been I cast my ”Freedom Rocks” while thinking of each and everyone of you.

May your Freedoms Rock”.



Hi Paul,

I would love to see the pics, I am so very proud of you. Not too many men admit that they have problems or are brave enough to come out and say they are hurting. I think some men still have that thinking of “boys don’t cry”. I hope that you never hurt like that again, life is meant to be enjoyed, and you don’t need toxic people in your life. I hear you are slowly getting out more, good for you. I’m still working on that. Going places alone is very hard for me.
I am glad you are on this site Paul, there is so much support, that’sa what we are all here for, that is why we somehow ended up on this site I think, is to help each other, listen, and learn.

Peace, Hugs, Luv and happiness (you already seem to have the freedom)


Hello Lauralee. Thank you for yet mor kindly inspiration.

I’m incredibly priveledged and grateful to be here and we have all ended up meeting each other here with our own unique life’s journy My own has beeen so very painful and troubled. Yet in my search for Freedom of abuses and to seek a better life I found You Lauralee and Darlene and everyone else we now here. so we can as you say help each other listen and learn.

Yes I cast my past demons away so free of them but now I need to start getting well after a life time of pain to build a healthy as possible future a future that’s in my own making ”Freedom rocks the beginning of my new found freedom.

Yes I know how difficult it is to go out alone I’m only able to go out as a friend is taking me out everywhere now. but it’s been a revelation. I’m witnessing life all around like I never saw it before. and I want some of life myself.

Forsure Lauralee Men do cry and very often they just are to ashamed to admit to it due to the way they are braught up led to believe men just dont cry and are meant to hide their emotions. Men I feel need to have organisations to turn to where they wont be judged when they need to express their hidden emotions. it can be life saving and life changing. I’m one such man who had to sream out loud in the streets before I found such an organisation.

O.K. Just call me ”chatterboxfreedomrockspaul”

Peace, Hugs, Luv and happyness and ”FREEDOM”


Hi Paul,

Well if you are a chatterbox then what am I. At work my boss would call me a social butterfly, funny man. I am happy to hear that you are getting out, there’s a whole beautiful world out there for you to enjoy!!! And that will help your healing journey. I feel great since the casting of my stone, my husbands family even commented on the change. Not sure if you have Facebook, but if you do you can add me, if you can’t find me then just go to Darlene’s and I’m there.
Everyone have a fantastic weekend!!!!

Peace, hugs, luv and happiness,oh and FREEDOM!!!!!

Lauralee xoxo


Hi Lauralee. What a pair of chatterboxeswe are.

I’m so happy you are felinggreat as I am. When people notice the change in us we best accept what they say. Your feeling better so believe in it. believe in one’s self. andYet awhole wondrful worldout there. it’s gone 12.30 a’m, and I have just nipped in after looking up at the stars. Just amaxing. right from my back door step.

One day soon I will grasp the stars and be as bright and colorful as they are.

Thank You Lauralee for being a major part of my ”FREEDOM”.



Hi everyone, you know what? I never got round to throwing my rock – it is still sitting here. On the Sunday that I had planned to throw it, I entered an intense period of grieving and I am still there. In my first post here, I said that I was raised by an NPD mother and a father who was her enabler and devoted servant. He was completely emotionally unavailable to me until his death when I was 14. I have done a lot of work on myself regarding the damage my mother did to me, but only recently started to understand how my father had been just as bad, albeit in a different way. And that is what I am currently grieving – the father I NEVER had. All the things he DIDNT do. His parenting style instilled so many false beliefs into my subconcious mind. I have spent decades believing that men do not support you, do not protect you, do not make you a priority, do not make you feel good about being a woman, do not ever make you feel loved. I believed that what they DID do is to make another woman, a woman who is selfish, cruel and sadistic, the centre of their universe and make YOU feel second best to her, make you feel pushed out, and as if you are a total bloody nuisance who has to be merely tolerated. These beliefs played out in every relationship I ever had. What triggered my current emotional state , was me becoming attracted to YET ANOTHER unavailable man. I am so glad that man came along – he will never know the gift he has given to me. I have needed to grieve, to cry, to shout and scream, to feel the pain I have carried around for years. This is HEALTHY grief. and I am so glad to be feeling it because this time, it has a purpose, it is taking me somewhere. I know that in future I will not seek out this type of man and try and get them to love me and put me first. I will get around to throwing that rock – I just needed to get some stuff out of the way first! Love and best wishes, Sylvia


Hi Sylvia,

That’s ok if your were not ready to throw your rock just yet, we are doing it again in the fall, perhaps you’ll feel like doing it then. I felt the same way about men, I was always attracted to men that abused me, did it 4 times until I finally woke up and realized I didn’t deserve this. Life was meant to be enjoyed and I was meant to be loved. Dr. Wayne Dyer said “if you want to accomplish something, you must first expect it from yourself” so that’s what I did. I gave myself permission to be loved, to be treated with respect by a man, to be treated as an equal and not a slave. It sure took me many mistakes, but I am finally in a happy marriage.I hope you come back to this site again, there is so much support here, and don’t worry about the rock, all good things take time my dear, you’ll be ready one day, I’m sure of it,
wishing you all the peace, hugs, luv, happiness and freedom you DESERVE!
Lauralee xoxo


Thank you so much, Lauralee, it is lovely to know I am supported here and I will definitely give myself permission to be loved, etc. I think thats something I have struggled with. I have sometimes caught myself feeling “selfish” for wanting to be happy and loved. It is the birthright of all of us to seek, find and keep love and happiness. How tragic that our own parents, the people who are supposed to love us best, are often the ones that convince us that we do not deserve to have these things. I will get there, I am determined not to waste any more of this precious life of mine feeling “not entitled” to good things. Thank you so much for your kind words, lovely lady. Big hugs from Sylvia xxx


Hello again Sylvia,

I know it in my soul that you will get there, give yourself the permission to grieve, I did for 10 years, how about that? I’m in such a better place now, and if I have an off day, well, so be it, I certainly can like everyone else. Glad to here you’ll be back, life is short and very precious, and it is too bad that some of us have parents who don’t know how to love, but we can get off that merry go round and start anew. Thinking and praying for your happiness,
Hugs, peace, luv, happiness and freedom from your pain,


Thank you Lauralee, I have just written out a list of affirmations, all the things I am giving myself permission to do. It feels so good! This is all thanks to you! I will be back very soon, big hugs and blessings for you, Much love from Sylvia xxx


Sylvia I am so happy for you! I can’t take the credit, you thought of that one on your own, one of the things I did, and taped them everywhere. I even gave myself a permission to cry all day if I wanted to. It felt great. I put my heart in a place where nobody can hurt it anymore, and since I have done that, I’ve healed. We can’t choose the behaviour of others, however, we can choose our reactions to their behaviour. When someone says something that I don’t appreciate, I say “Thanks, but no thanks” It really screws them up. haha I choose peace over arguing, It’s amazing that we actually have the choice. Sure I could have stayed and argued with my family until I was blue in the face, however, I choose peace in my life, and they certainly are not peace. You may stumble along your journey, but you’ll get back up, and a journey of healing begins with a single step, you are already there, just look at what you did today. I am very proud of you for it takes much courage to allow ourselves the permission to feel and do certain things. It’s like talking to that little child in you, telling her that it’s ok and she doesn’t have to be scared anymore. Much success on your journey Sylvia!
Peace, hugs, luv, happiness and freedom,
Lauralee xoxo


Hello Everyone,

Just finsished watching a Dr. Wayne Dyer show, he’s a motivational speaker, and here is one of the things he said. People were given 5 pieces of cardboard and were asked to write down 5 chapters of their lives. Here is what one lady wrote: CHAPTER 1: I walked down a street, there is a big hole, I fall in, I’m stuck and it takes hours to get out, who put this here, how can they be so dumb? CHAPTER 2: I walk down the street, there is a big hole and I fall in, here I am again, stuck in this dark hole, I can’t belive it’s still here, it takes forever to get out. CHAPTER 3: I walk down the street, there is a big hole, I fall in again, it’s my fault! I knew this hole was here, I get out right away. CHAPTER 4: I walk down the street, there is a big hole, I see it and walk around it. CHAPTER 5: I WALK DOWN A NEW STREET!
I just love this, hope you all enjoy it as well, and I hope it gets ya thinking, wishing you all a wonderful rest of your day,
Peace, love, hugs, happiness and Freedom
Lauralee xoxo


I think I could use The Rock of Gibraltar and dump it! I’ll just have to settle for a brick instead. 🙂 And why wait? I think I will do it when I take my next beach trip.


Hi Aileyess
A brick is a great idea too! Welcome to emerging from broken


I love the story about the crabs 🙂
And the idea about throwing out rocks.

I am just so upset because I was way smarter when I was a kid. At least that’s what I like to think. I made a decision and I wanted to stick with it.
At 18 I ran away. I knew my family did not love, that they hurt me, that they were worng and I did not try to understand anything. I did not need to.
BUT even though I felt I should have, I did not include my sister in that bunch. Which turned out to be the biggest mistake. How do you call that horse than no one is betting on and all of a sudden that horse actually wins? Well that was my sister, I thought she was the least toxic out of the bunch, and when you family is small it is hard to get rid of all of them at the same time.
But my sister was the force pulling me back in, pushing me to get back in contact with my mom. Even though she knew how it was. She was the golden. And than we are back to our childhood.
I just love when they talk about me using the third person in my presense, as if I am not there. If I did what I felt like, no matter how extreme, I would not have been in this situation now.
Or would I?

What do you guys think?
My way of coping at that time was to just sweep everything under the carpet, lock my memory and throw out the key.
Would the memories hunt me? Would someone find the key at some point anyways?
How does it work?
I beat myself up with all the should haves…
But than again I did not realize that despite not being in touch with them I kept playing the same role in relationships for instance.


Thank you for validating my feelings and freeing me from my past and the lies. When I told my family I have known about the lies for years,they were in shock. Why did it take me so long for everything to click. I was too busy bringing up children and working. As an empty nester,I am glad I know the truth and don,t have to wonder why I was treated differently. It was all about money and greed and finally getting me out of the equation by lying. How can families do that, when someone is in dire need, you know there is help from an Aunt available and your brothers tell you and your four children,don,t ask for help. You can go live in the street! When they use my Aunt,s money for their homes,business and vacations.. Luckily it all came to a head. I got stronger. I have a few working years left and getting back on my feet. They have been exposed and it hurts but I love their children but don,t mind if I don,t see my bros and wives,since they were mean,said nasty things about me to others, and want me out the way. But I am free,they have the burden. My kids know what happened and they told me how selfish they were. I have a nice life now and very blessed. My never ending guilt has finally left me. I forgive but won,t forget. Never thought I could be on my own,I like it now!! I was always scared before. Thank you for the awakening


Hello Beryl,
Welcome to the group, you will find a lot of strength here as you read along. I am at the stage in my life where I am finally happy and at peace. I lost my whole family, now even my children have turned their backs and see my family but not me. It took some time as it really hurt, but now, I am a much happier person and I love my new life. I miss my grandbabies like crazy, and know I will never see them again until we are all in heaven, but it is what it is. The trust is gone, the betrayal, the lies, I will not live like that anymore. I am the black sheep of the family, always have been but I would rather be the black sheep that be the white sheep stuck in the same place as 1970. It’s nice to know that you are happy with your life, and I hope it continues. You don’t need people who are negative and try and control you and don’t give a rats behind what you think in your life. Good luck, much peace and love, Lauralee xo

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